Most of you know what happened to me recently, about six weeks ago....I lost my beautiful wife Jerri. I loved her more than anyone on Earth, spent half my life with her...and now am having to deal with a lot of horrid emotions, as has anyone who loses their life partner. What I have learned from this is there is one question we dont want people to ask us...How are you?. That is a question we dont want to answer, nor do you really want to hear the answer. We know you ask us because you care, and we love and appreciate you for that....but, if we truly tell you how we are, we will be crumbled on the floor and you will be stymied as to how to respond to us. We are not ok, as we might say to you..Oh, Im ok. Thats a total lie, just a line to move the subject on to something else. The truth is, we are crushed, we are devasted, we are in total disbeilief the person we loved most has vanished from Earth. It is beyond our comprehension that we really will never see, hear, hold, love, talk to or share our life with that person again......ever. We walk into our home.....and are totally alone. That person is still all around us, pictures, clothes, other belongings....and we dont want to touch them or remove them. Every thing we do each day, everything, we think about when we did that very same thing with our spouse. We constantly think, what now, life as we knew it is totally over....so what now? We cant even imagine falling in love again, because we feel we already had the perfect person. It just seems impossible to start over with someone else.....so what now. Many of us are also having real physical reactions to the trauma....sickness in our stomachs, really not wanting to eat but forcing ourselves to eat. Ive now learned why doctors are saying dont forget to take care of yourself. We have to force ourselves to do that. Anyway, I just wanted to give you a different perspective. Dont ask how are you. A simple sorry for your loss or condolences for your loss is more than enough, we know that you care and we dont have to give you a line of bs about being ok. We are not and wont be for a long time.. Love you all Oh, one more thing.....thank you notes will eventually go out....right now, we are dealing with many things.
Posted on: Sun, 06 Apr 2014 00:19:57 +0000
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