My conversation with my eight year old while she was picking the winners for the 20 signed sets of Collide and Pulse: Ava-- Im just gonna pick all the ones that made a birthday cake for Noah and the lady who sang to him. Me-- Oh no, baby. They didnt make a cake for him. They used a picture from on line. Besides, we need to be fair and also pick women who didnt post a cake picture, but still said happy birthday to Noah. Ava-- Duh, Ma. Most of them SAY Noah on it. They made it for his birthday. Plus, the ones without cakes are boring. Noah wont like that. Me-- (Trying to think of something that would be appropriate to say to an 8 year old without--I dont know--crushing her imagination or hurting her feelings.) Ava, you do know that Noah isnt-- Ava-- Oh, and this lady, too, because she doesnt LIKE the Yankees! (Snickers) Youre the only one in the house--well--you and Gavin are the only ones in the house who like the Yankees. Dad hates them. Im picking her for Dad. Me-- (Slightly losing my regard for hurting her feelings or damaging her imagination) Ava-girl, you do know Im smarter than daddy, right? I mean, he doesnt even LIKE baseball. Ava-- Right, because the Yankees are in it. Dad said they suc-- Me-- (Thinking my husband needs to lose a...ball 3:) ) Hey! Be nice. Ava- Rolls eyes. Me-- Look. (Goes to show her that there are indeed cakes on line with the name Noah on them. While Im at it, I show her the Yankees page, history, stats, and some of their cutest players.) See. Theres cakes with the name Noah on it already, AND the Yankees do not suc-... (Clears throat) The Yankees are a good team. Daddys just...a man. There are times women listen to them, and times we do not. One of those times that we do not is right now. Understand? Ava-- Not gonna work, Ma. You said it was my turn to pick the winner. That means I can pick who I want. Those ladies made the cakes for Noahs birthday. Mr. McHugh trots down the stairs, a wicked grin on his face-- They sure did, baby girl. And the Yankees do indeed suck. He swings his attention toward me, kicking me a wink. Tell Gavin to toss a bottle cap around that one. Me-- Go. Away. Now. Before. I...De-Ball you. Looking marginally offended, Mr. McHugh places a shocked hand over his heart. My, God. Would you talk to your beloved Yankees lover like that? Me-- 5... Mr. McHugh-- Smiles. Me-- 4... Mr. McHugh-- Smile widening. Me-- Stands up. 3... Mr. McHugh-- Smile slightly falls. All the same, theres still challenge in his eyes which keeps me moving. Me-- 2...not kidding McHugh. Im about to hurt you on behalf of MOST of the state of New York. Ava-- Dad, run! Mr. McHugh chuckles, turns around, and retreats back upstairs, while mumbling something about pansy millionaires who love the Yankees, green minivans, and collecting bottle caps like a freak. Me-- Sits back down, mumbling something about which one of us needs therapy more. The one whos essentially jealous of the pansy millionaire, minivan loving, bottle cap collector, or his creator. :-/ Smiling, Ava swings her arm around my shoulder.-- Okay, Ma. Ill make it even, but next year Im picking the ones who baked the cakes for Noahs 2nd birthday, cool? Mr. McHugh pokes head back in the room, his words fast and clipped.-- Thats sweet of ya, baby girl. But no matter how many cakes they bake for Noah, the Yankees will STILL suck, and Gavins creator will forever be in need of therapy more than I will EVER be. Darts back up stairs, chuckling the entire way. Sigh... Congratulations to the below winners. By the 2nd week of September (waiting on my copies of Pulse from my publisher) youll receive a signed copy of Collide, Pulse, and some swag. Please email your address to author.gail.mchugh@gmail and mark it as Noahs birthday giveaway winner. Ignore the email thatll bounce back. My PA will catch your information.
Posted on: Mon, 07 Jul 2014 15:12:31 +0000
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