NP Presents: Trick-or-Treating with The Monkees! So, perhaps you’ve wondered just what it would be like to go trick-or-treating at one of the Monkees’ houses. What kind of goodies would you get? Who gives out the toothbrushes and health food? Which one would leave the porch light off altogether? Well, let’s find out, by golly! Without further ado, here is our take on trick-or-treating, Monkees style: **Davy:** Davy would give out a 5”x 7” black-and-white autographed photo of himself. The exchange would probably go something like this: Kids: “Trick or treat!” Davy: ”All right, now what are your names? Give ‘em to me quick, I don’t have all night. We’ll start with you in the ghost costume.” Kid: ”But I’m an angel…” Davy: ”Yes, I know, darling. Now who am I making this out to?” And then the kids would walk away muttering “Weeniehead” under their breath, to which Davy would call after them in response: “That’s *Mr.* David Weeniehead Jones, please and thank you!” **Micky:** Micky would give out a 5-pound Hershey bar. “And you get a 5 lb. chocolate bar, and you get a 5-lb. chocolate bar, and YOU get a 5-lb. chocolate bar! AHAHAHA!” Basically, Micky would be a hyperactive and somewhat frightening combination of Oprah and Willy Wonka…and the kids would absolutely love him for it. Definitely the most visited house in the neighborhood. **Peter:** Peter would give out organic, pesticide-free fruit. “Don’t eat that processed crap, kids! IT’S A LIE!” he’d warn while distributing lychees and mangoes and guavas. Peter might also give out brownies and say, “If you’re gonna have the brownie, come inside. And here’s a towel. Oh, and if you feel like you’re freaking out, the safe word is blueberry.” **Mike:** One of two things would happen with Mike: Either he’d come outside every time the doorbell rings and go “Whaaat?” while glaring at the kids, then proceed to tell them that when he was a kid, he had to walk ten miles to the neighbor’s house on Halloween, “and they didn’t give out no candy…it was chewin’ tabacca n’ a coupla rocks. Yessir.” And he’d give the kids gator jerky and tell them to get off his lawn. OR, Scenario #2: He’d be the guy with the light off and a giant bowl of mixed candy on the porch with a signed taped above it that says “TAKE ONE. AND THE SAME THING GOES FOR CHRISTMAS”.
Posted on: Fri, 31 Oct 2014 16:15:37 +0000
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