Okay so several of my long-standing veterans festival code were broken on night one: 1. Its a marathon not a sprint - 23 days/nights to go. 2. Dont see a brilliant show on day 1 - the rest will not match up. See something really bad. Its like having an unbelievable partner, its unfair to the rest. 3. Dont be THAT drunken local - if the tourists are just smiling cutely, theyre thinking the Scottish stereotype is true. You might as well wear a kilt. 4. Lightening doesnt strike twice 5. The tourists are lovely and exotic - but remember, youre like the animals at the zoo... They get to go home at the end of it. No point getting pissed off with your cage and doing a big poo in the corner. Youll be in the parade again next year. 5. Stop offering tours. Youre not a travel company. 6. Always remember youve still got to get home. 1hr night buses are a buzz kill - although sometimes they should have their own venue number. 7. If youre getting home after sunrise, the next arrangements shouldnt be made before sunset. 8. Dont have drunken access to the festival app... I booked two shows at 5am based on amazing recommendations. Naked musical about Thatcher, anyone?! 9. Any, ANY, thought you have at 3am is probably a crap one. In fact, if youre still having thoughts or, worse still, trying to talk, give up and go home. If youre not pulling, or at least close, youre not going to. Unless youre dancing - and even then, youre probably looking more Tramadol than Travolta. 10. Sleep is not your enemy, its an old lover you must court and cherish. Occasionally embrace it, even if to remind you the next day aint too bad. 11. Treat every day like your last is just a phrase. And quite possibly the most stupid coined. Ever. By someone who has never done 4 weeks of the fringe. 12. Eating is a physical necessity. Not an optional upgrade.
Posted on: Sat, 02 Aug 2014 10:52:55 +0000
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