Our next post I need to ask my fellow bonus moms for your opinion while also venting one of my frustrations.... I just do NOT understand my generation of moms whats so ever (not all moms of course but the majority I have run into recently). My parents divorced when I was barley a toddler and my dad remarried before I was old enough to remember. My step mom has always been in my life as a parental figure, a friend, a shoulder to cry in, everything. She would come to my school functions and birthday parties, graduation all of it with my dad of course. I have never seen anything but kindness, mutual respect, and even love between my parents and stepmom. My mother always praised my SM for the wonderful person she is, and still does. She loves that my daughter is named after both of them because she knows how big a part of my life they both are. I am 30 yes old and they r still friends and chat. So it wasnt an act for my benefit as a child. Now fast forward to present day and my relationship with my SDs BM and it is polar opposites. From day one she did nothing but antagonize me, try to fight with me (verbally and physically). She would lie about me and DH in court and to social workers. And even years after we were granted full and permanent custody, she would explode anytime I did anything motherly with my SD. My SD is 10 yes old. I have been with DH 8 years, married 6. We have had custody of her since she was 5 years old. Now BM is realizing that its not working and is trying to be civil with me. Even tried to give me advice when I had my daughter. And although in my face she stopped being a monster, my SD still comes home from visits telling me how horrible I am because I make her this out her garbage, put her own laundry away, and put her dishes in the sink because he mom told her thats my job. Im a stay at home mom so to her that equals maid. Which is funny since she has never had a job in her life (she is 35), always leaves her other kids and my SD with relatives so she can go out and her house is a pigsty. I guess what I want your opinion on is, have you noticed the same types of differences in the different generations of parents and step parents. And how can I get to a civil place with her, because I know friendly is out of the question. Thank you for letting me vent and ramble a bit. I know its long, sorry.
Posted on: Tue, 05 Aug 2014 17:02:48 +0000