Our topic today focuses on an important strategy for your success — having the awareness and skills to respond. Responding is a simple skill and essential behavior for effective communication, that if not practiced can lead to upset, conflict and diminished success. Years ago, when I coached women one-on-one, responding was often one of the first skills I would work on with leaders to help them achieve. Here are two recent emails I received that reveal what happens when we fail to respond: Dear Debbie, My boss never tells me I’m doing a good job. Even though my performance reviews are always stellar, I’d like to hear throughout the year when I do a good job. It makes me nervous and it’s so stressful to have to wait until my annual review to learn whether I’m on track. I don’t want to seem too needy by asking for an occasional compliment. I’ve started to look elsewhere for a job, but I really love the work I do and don’t want to leave. Any thoughts? Love, Cathy And this one: Hi Debbie, My husband and I see a couple we enjoy a lot. But they both have the same quirk. Sometimes when we’re invited to their house, they don’t even look up and greet us after we’ve come in. Other times, I might share something personal or exciting or important and they don’t comment – or they’ll change the subject. Other than that, we have fun with them and would like to continue our friendship. Is there anything we should say or do? I’m sure we have our own quirks that bug them! Thanks, Liz The issue both Cathy and Liz are frustrated by is a lack of response from people who are important to them. Most likely, if Cathy’s boss or Liz’s friends knew how much their behavior hurt them, they’d be shocked. People don’t respond for a variety of reasons. In my two decades as a life and executive coach, I’ve observed that most people who don’t respond simply never learned the skills and are unaware that they aren’t responding. What non-responders don’t realize is that... Find out from founder Debbie Phillips, how to master the art of responding to reduce conflict and confusion below! Want articles like this sent directly to your inbox? Signup for the Spark! here ->bit.ly/1oYz10z
Posted on: Mon, 03 Nov 2014 21:57:40 +0000