Please pray for me! I realllly need to feel Gods hand in this. As many of you know we adopted our little miss Lai la five years ago and she is very much our daughter. Lai la has special needs although she is six years old Lai la doesnt speak and is unable to walk. I do however BELIEVE she will walk on her own in time. Lai la is mostly a happy child who like other small children likes to watch YO GABBA GABBA, Dora the Explorer and lets not forget Barney. She has her way of letting us know when she is hungry, or wants to watch TV, but Lai la is also mentally challenged so it is hard to know just how much she really comprehends. Did I forget to mention she is absolutely gorgeous! The older Lai la gets the more challenges we will have to face together as a family, for now Lai la is still quite small and having a awesome big brother is a blessing! Noah is so loving and supportive with her it really makes me so proud to be his momma! Her two older sisters are also very good with her, they will get her standing and hold onto both her hands and dance with her to Happy Lai la seems to like that song. Daddy loves La la and she knows it, she lights up the minute daddy comes home. Daddy picks her up and sits her next to him on the couch with his arm around her and shes just as happy as can be! I would say about 75 percent of the time Lai la is happy but its the other 25 percent that has me shamelessly begging for prayer. Lai la will suddenly go from a happy sweet little girl to a very angry at times violent little girl filled with rage. It is scary to see your child hitting her self with such force that it leaves bruises on her face! When she is like this she is inconsolable she wont let me hold her or try to comfort her I only make it worse. Even feeding her is treacherous when she is like this. She looks at me with such anger while clinching her teeth. We usually only get through half a meal due to her screaming and shaking her head while food flys out of her mouth. By this time my stomach is full of knots and Im more than ready to clean her up and put her to bed. The next morning I nervously enter her room praying that this mood if you will has passed and that my sweet little girl has returned. These moods typically last any where from two to three days to a week. One time it lasted THREE weeks straight! If it last more than two days I take her to the doctors to make sure she doesnt have ear infections, or a throat infection, or a bladder infection you name we tested her to make sure something wasnt hurting her. She almost always back with a clean bill of health. Thank God! But then WHY? Why is my baby girl so angry! Why does it come on out of the blue? What causes it? Sometimes I think she is just so frustrated with her situation and who could blame her? Being trapped in her own body that has failed her! Not being able to voice her wants or needs, or to run and play like other children. When Qamar and I decided to adopt a child with special needs we were aware that we were making a lifelong commitment I knew there was a chance I would be changing diapers for the rest of my life. I knew I would have to help her bathe, and dress, and feed. I was and still am prepared for that. What I wasnt prepared for was the anger! I was totally caught off guard! We love Lai la very much shes our sweet princess pickles. So please pray for our family that God will grant us his knowledge and grace in dealing with Lai la. And PLEASE PLEASE PRAY FOR LAI LA! Please forgive me for the length of this post........
Posted on: Wed, 27 Aug 2014 06:39:46 +0000
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