Post-Thanksgiving/Pre-Christmas is a great time to perform a little introspection. If you have a hard time trusting, it could be for a thousand reasons. Often it could be because someone violated your trust when you were very young. Someone did something that wasn’t trustworthy. I’m not blaming them, everyone make mistakes, but sometimes when this happens you are the one who has to live with the consequence of either not trusting people or trusting people who don’t deserve it. And then getting short played all over again. There is a way to start fresh, to start to learn to trust the right people, but it requires some truth telling on your part. Start by knowing the qualities of trustworthy people. If they do all of these things, or most of these things, then it may be safe or appropriate for you to trust them. If there are people in your life who don’t do these things; well, they may not be worthy of your trust. Here are some Qualities of Trustworthy People… •Trustworthy people usually show up on time. •When trustworthy people say something will happen, it usually does. •If trustworthy people tell you about an event, the information they give you is so thorough that when you find out more about the event or learn about it from another source, usually the descriptions match. •Trustworthy people rarely lie and don’t expect you to lie for them. •Trustworthy people usually don’t lie by omission to “protect’ you or because they want to avoid “ upsetting ” you. •Trustworthy people are rarely hypocritical. •Trustworthy people usually give real apologies. •Trustworthy people’s behaviors match their actions. Know how to practice healthy trust with all of the new people in your life or the ones you decide are trustworthy. Trust is a shared ladder and people climb it together one rung at a time. If you’re healthy, it’s usually pretty safe to get a rung ahead or a rung behind the other person. But just one. It’s okay to take a risk and put yourselves out there for another person. Not a big risk, but a small one where you can be a tiny bit vulnerable. Something else to consider, check the list again. This time thinking about yourself. Are you trustworthy? Start becoming a trustworthy person if you are not already one; yes, those little white lies count. “ Be the change you wish to see in the world, “ as Gandhi said on numerous occasions. You can’t really expect the people around you to be trustworthy if you’re not, because that would be hypocritical and that is not a quality of a trustworthy person. Speaking of trust, did you ever think about how establishing a trust-fund lets you choose who will have control of making investment and management decisions for your assets after you’re gone? Ohhh yeah, by picking either a financial institution or a family adviser to act as Trustee, you can ensure that someone you believe has the ability to manage your money for years or even decades will be in charge of your trust. Most importantly, having a trust in place can actually protect your family members in certain cases. If one of your heirs is disabled or has other special needs, a well-crafted trust can provide supplemental financial support while still allowing access to available government benefits. Also, if an heir gets divorced, trust assets typically arent considered as part of the heirs marital property, preventing the divorcing spouse from taking a share of your contribution to the family savings. Many Baby Boomers and even aging Generation Xers who started out with modest means want their children to have the same incentive to work hard and struggle for their financial prosperity, rather than having it handed to them. Moreover, a large fraction of Boomers believe their offspring dont know how to handle money, an opinion which might lead them to conclude their children also lack the wherewithal to handle a large inheritance. Research bears out those concerns. Figures from The Williams Group estimate that barely a third of families are able to maintain control of their wealth through the second generation, and only one third of that third manage to keep third-generation control. Relax! With some planning, you can actually provide whatever protection from your accumulated wealth that you believe your kids need. Its not difficult to keep your kids from squandering their newfound wealth indiscriminately. Its all about setting up controls the most powerful of which is creating a trust, either during your lifetime or written into your will. A trust lets you determine when and to what extent your kids and other heirs will get access to your financial resources. For instance, in most States, children can take control of assets that arent held in trust when they turn age 18. But with a trust in place, you can choose whatever age you want. One common strategy is to make partial distributions at various ages ranging from ages 25 to 45, but trust law allows for longer terms at your discretion. You can also craft the trust to allow the trustee to make distributions to your heirs at regular intervals, helping the money last as long as possible while still making it available in times of true need.
Posted on: Tue, 02 Dec 2014 01:46:35 +0000
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