Pyne, J. (2012). Transforming Family: Trans Parents and their Struggles, Strategies, and Strengths. Toronto: LGBTQ Parenting Network, Sherbourne Health Centre Trans Parents as Role Models for Diversity, Acceptance & Authenticity „The thing I taught him, without actually teaching it to him, is courage.“ (Lisa) The report fills a gap in knowledge by documenting the impact of transphobia on trans parents and drawing attention to the strengths that they bring to parenting. It gets better: trans parents’ relationships with their children improve over time. Through coming out or transitioning, trans parents eventually experienced an improved sense of wellbeing and often began negotiating new names and roles with their children. Together with the growing social acceptance of trans people, these negotiations allowed many children to develop a new relationship with their trans parent. Trans parents said clearly: It does get better. Transphobia and erasure have real effects on trans parents and their children. Trans people in general experience public scrutiny, harassment and discrimination. For those who are parents this occurs in multiple settings and can cause pain and confusion for children. Trans parents experience not only active discrimination but also more subtle forms of erasure, rendering them invisible and unrecognizable to service providers. Trans parents and their families struggle on more than one front, often with very little support. Trans parents and their children exercise agency in how they respond to transphobia. Though trans parents and their children are deeply impacted by transphobia, they are not passive victims, instead actively strategizing to address discrimination. Trans parents protect themselves and their children by making choices to be or not be visible, by advocating for themselves and their children and by educating their children about transphobia. Creatively navigating unfriendly environments, trans parents challenge assumptions about gender through everyday acts of activism. Trans parents teach important lessons. Trans parents demonstrate a number of parenting strengths, at times because of, rather than in spite of, their identities and experiences as trans people. As they journey to express their unique selves, they become role models for diversity, acceptance and authenticity. As they struggle and learn the difficult skills of self-advocacy, they pass on vital lessons about strategy, endurance and courage. And as they create options for their children to express their authentic selves, they raise a new gender literate generation, contributing to building, as one participant put it, “the world that needs to be.”
Posted on: Wed, 24 Sep 2014 12:18:36 +0000
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