SGI Members Testmonial - A Family Learns to Never Give Up by Kathy Gormley This is an experience about my parents. Well, actually its about my whole family and the Spokane, Wash., SGI-USA members who supported and chanted for us. My parents, who are now in their mid-70s, started practicing Nichiren Buddhism in their mid-50s, which is extraordinary considering we were a devout Catholic family. My brother John initially told me about Buddhism, and then one by one my whole family started practicing - Mom, Dad, all five children and even our grandmother! As you can imagine, we have had lots of opportunities to challenge old ways of thinking, feeling and interacting. In 1996, my father, who had been practicing 16 years, suddenly collapsed. When doctors couldnt discover the problem, he was transferred to a nursing home. There, they experimented with medication and physical therapy. I vividly recall the first night he was there. It was like being transported into a hellish nightmare. My father was placed in a small room with a man who was screaming in pain. I chanted softly with Dad, all the while trying not to gag on the stench of urine that permeated everything. It was tempting to give in to despair and do the poor me victim thing, but I remembered SGI President Ikedas encouragement that we choose our circumstances to help us fulfill our mission. InThe New Human Revolution, he writes: Buddhism teaches that its practitioneres voluntarily choose to be born in evil circumstances so they may help others. This means that although we have accumulated the benefit through Buddhist practice to be born in favorable circumstances, we have purposely chosen to be born int he midst of suffering people and there propagate the Mystic Law (vol. 1, p.253). I remember telling Dad, OK, were definitely in the midst of suffering people, and if you can do it, we can do it! It was easy to feel compassion as our family shared Nam-myoho-renge-kyo with others in that facility. There was so much loneliness and despair. People seemed to appreciate Buddhisms message - that their lives are precious and powerful, no matter what the circumstances. Even Dads roommate listened. Physically, my dad began to worsen. He rambled and didnt recognise us at times, and then his legs became totally useless. Mom was vigilant, quizzing the nurses and doctors about Dads medication, physical therapy and prognosis. Most of the medical staff were very supportive. One social worker, however, was condescending and dismissive of my family. One of the main tenets of this practice, creating value from seemingly negative experiences, sustained me during a memorable exchange with her. We had just come out of a disheartening meeting with Dads medical team, in which they explained that Dad probably had Parkinsons disease. The social worker declared: You just need to accept that your dad will never get well. He will always be like this, and hes never coming home! My determination to show actual proof soared to new heights as I looked her straight in the eye and said, Well see about that!My sister found a fantastic neurologist who told us that only once before in his career had he seen poisoning from a particular kind of seizure medicine, which mimics the symptoms of Parkinsons. My father had been on this kind of medication for years for epilepsy. My mom agreed to try a different seizure medicine and gradually, Dad regained his mental capabilities, speech and memory. It was incredible! His legs, however, still werent functioning, and Medicare had declined to continue his physical therapy. My family challenged this situation by chanting more and telling more people about Buddhism. Also, we were now piling Dads wheelchair into the car and taking him to every SGI-USA activity we could.Two very wonderful things happened rapidly after that. First, Troy, an SGI-USA member who worked as a physical therapist at a nursing home close to my parents house, put Dads name on the waiting list there. We toured this place, and it was absolutely beautiful. The nursing home said the waiting list was long for the unit my dad needed. We pleaded for a spot as soon as possible. Somehow our determination and prayers moved the obstacles away,and my dad was transferred within a week. As he was being wheeled into his new home, he turned to me and said, One day I will walk out of here. The second incredible benefit was that my dads physical therapy was reinstated. Troy was assigned to my dad. He even drove my father to chiropractic appointments 45 minutes away to help my mom. Throughout this entire time, the Spokane-area SGI-USA members were incredible. They helped lift Dads wheelchair in and out of the car and wheel him in and out of the community center. A moving moment came when my dad received a portable Gohonzon to be with him at the nursing home. Many members had tears in their eyes as Dad took some of his very first steps with a walker to receive it. The members also generously arranged a banquet at the community center to celebrate New Years Day and my parents 50th wedding anniversary. All my parents wanted for their anniversary was to be with the members.I remember one night, when I was visiting him, Dad didnt look right and seemed distant. I pointed this out to the nurse, and she said, Hes just depressed, and hes been dong this mumbling all day. I told her this didnt look like depression at all, and she finally admitted he could be having petit mal seizures. She called the doctor, who ordered an ambulance. The doctors adjusted his medication, and from then on he grew stronger and stronger. And he was right - two years later, my dad did walk out of that nursing home. The joy was indescribable as the nurses, aides and patients lined up along the hallway to clap for him as he walked out the door! This experience was a two-year process. One particular passage from Buddista -SGI - Nichiren Daishoninns writing On Prayer gave us hope: Though one might point at the earth and miss it, though one might bind up the sky, though the tides might cease to ebb and flow and the sun rise in the west, it could never come about that the prayers of the practitioner of the Lotus Sutra would go unanswered (The Writings of Nichiren Daishonin, p.336). Without the incredible support of our SGI-USA family, I dont think we could have made it through this challenging journey. Among our many benefits, I think the most important was that it brought our family closer together, confidence and wisdom we didnt know we possessed. It also gave us and our fellow members an opportunity to see the power of this fantastic practice to change circumstances for the better. Two years after my dad returned home, he had a stroke. Again he lost the use of his legs. This time, however, he stayed home with the help of some wonderful caregivers. Im happy to report that he is now walking again with the aid of a cane. My parents are amazing, and I deeply appreciate that they went through this experience to demonstrate a never-give-up-spirit, the revitalising power of Nam-myoho-renge-kyo and the value of our great SGI organisation.
Posted on: Tue, 23 Sep 2014 04:50:48 +0000
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