Sharing post on FORGIVENESS He brings out Choosing forgiveness as an unconscious escape from confronting and moving beyond paralyzing guilt and fear. People being seduced by the ideology of forgiveness as the antidote to their inner pain and turmoil. But in reality all they had done was suppress their own emotional aliveness and Authentic Selves. Genuine, non-suppressive forgiveness is like a flower slowly unfurling toward the sun. The flower isnt willfully choosing to unfold but is expressing its life-force and desire to expand and grow! Read more : BEYOND PREMATURE FORGIVENESS TO EMOTIONAL FREEDOM DEAR FRIENDS- DEAR FRIENDS- Here is a spiritually incorrect- but thoroughly self-loving and liberating- truth. Choosing to forgive is never necessary for you to heal. And it may actually prevent you from doing so! To understand why this is so- keep reading..... I have always felt that choosing to forgive is very much like choosing to fall in love. Why? Because in each case we use our will to force/implant an attitude rather than surrendering to a real and instinctive feeling in our heart. In both love and forgiveness deeply and unambivalently FEELING IT is the real thing! But using our will to decide something which by its nature needs to be sincere and spontaneous is an illusion that will lead to emotional suppression- and eventually disappointment. In both these matters of the heart, it is only whole-hearted passion that truly liberates and satisfies us. The thing to understand is that you cant use the adopting of forgiveness as an escape from fully confronting your feelings- to the very bottom of your body, heart and soul. Those of us who have been deeply wounded need to courageously face every layer of pain and anger that lives in us and awaits its chance to come alive and be expressed. And by walking the path of total trust in our feelings, total emotional aliveness and complete self-expression- ultimately let it all go. In this way we avoid the self-defeating error of burying/suppressing our unhealed feelings beneath a spiritualized ideology of pardon. In my practice of Core/Bioenergetic Psychotherapy I have encountered over and over again people who said that they had forgiven their Mother, Father, abuser, betrayer etc. And yet just beneath the surface lay an enormous burden of unhealed feelings about the people and situations they had supposedly absolved. These buried emotions were contributing to their depression, anxiety, relationship problems, general unhappiness and even physical illnesses. In almost all of these people there was deep guilt over the intensity of the authentic- and totally legitimate and natural!- rage and hate they felt about being so terribly abused or violated. Or, they harbored a fear of the power of their own feelings in relation to those that had hurt them. Choosing forgiveness was an unconscious escape from confronting and moving beyond this paralyzing guilt and fear. These people had unknowingly been seduced by the ideology of forgiveness as the antidote to their inner pain and turmoil. But in reality all they had done was suppress their own emotional aliveness and Authentic Selves. Genuine, non-suppressive forgiveness is like a flower slowly unfurling toward the sun. The flower isnt willfully choosing to unfold but is expressing its life-force and desire to expand and grow! If forgiveness is what you need to be happy and at peace it will emerge in a natural and spontaneous way- by continually releasing your pain and anger until it is utterly gone. A natural, unforced feeling (not decision) of forgiveness often arises as our bodies, hearts and spirits are freed from their burden. By staying completely self-connected and courageously accepting all the feelings emerging from your emotional depths you will feel better and better and ultimately be healed to your very core. With or without forgiveness! And whether or not forgiveness spontaneously dawns in you- some people need this and some truly dont- you will awaken the peace and happiness you deserve. Because you have set yourself free by staying true to YOU! Your warriors commitment to embrace everything inside you is the sacred medicine of Unconditional Self-Love. Keep feeling, keep healing- and in that fearless and open-hearted love for yourself you will be reborn! LOTS OF LOVE- BRIAN
Posted on: Thu, 17 Apr 2014 13:28:29 +0000
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