So today was kind of hectic. I got my daughter off to school and my husband off on a weekend trip and then spent my morning making sure I was prepared for my talk at KU this afternoon. I got out of there at 2 and realized I was FAMISHED because I *had not actually eaten one dang thing.* This pretty much never happens. I wake up and have the same breakfast every day and then I pack a lunch. I eat it at about the same time. Im a routine girl. So thrown slightly off my routine, now I had to do serious damage control. In the past forgetting to eat would have been more likely *trying not to eat.* I starved myself and took pride in going so long without food. The trouble is, once you do eat its almost impossible to make yourself feel satiated. If you even occasionally read dieting advice you know that it takes about 20 minutes to feel full. In this case, with a roaring beast of sudden incredible hunger, my damage control involved selecting an amount of food that I know makes me feel good... because if I ate what I felt like in this moment - it would be everything in my whole house. And for me, the problem with that has more to do with how sick I would feel after and not (oh no!!) calories. I had the breakfast I didnt mean to skip and part of the lunch I shouldve already had and Im waiting to see if I feel better. Its hard to believe I used to do this to myself all the time. What I want to do right now is go get my lifting session in for today, but I have to instead wait to see if I have the energy for it. To think not eating and then shaming myself for my bodys sudden desire to eat EVERYTHING was my M.O. is pretty sad. Eating is important. In this case my skipping was a total oversight that so rarely occurs. But the reaction from my body is the same. Starving is the worst. Energy is important. Feed yourself. **worth mention Im talking about disordered eating or in this case, accidents and not eating disorders. Those are more complicated than feed yourself.**
Posted on: Thu, 01 May 2014 19:39:52 +0000
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