Sooooo, This very merry morning, I decided to search and destroy the foul odor of a decaying body, that seems to be in the near vicinity of the back yard. Armed with my smeller and the company of 4 dogs, we braved the doggy doo minefield. (Note to self: remember to clean the poo BEFORE next time). It was soon evident the dogs were more interested in adding to the minefield then helping me. And there they were. The Lowes disposable fly traps, you see they never dried out. With all the rain keeping the multitudes of dead fly bodies moist thus adding to the traps wonderful odor of a decaying hobo forced to eat bleu cheese, onions, sardines, anchovies and a bit of broccoli for years, then have said hobo stay constipated, say for 3 months and then exhume this odor that they package for fly bait......ahhhhhhh. Tis truly a gift well worth sharing with family and friends! I bravely started unwrapping the wire holding the mess, and BAM! drop the bag like a exploding water balloon of one of the worst nightmares I have ever seen. You see Ive seen dead flies before, Ive even smashed a few myself. But this grey and black soup . This was something the likes of which would scare the blackest witch to grab her dress and high step it to a field of roses instead. My head was spinning as I ran for a shovel and a bag. All I could rationally think of was to scoop up this tainted soil, yes including the wet dirt, and toss it in the nieghbors trash....I know, I know but the way I see it is why should I be the only human to experiance this delight? I come back to the horrible, wickedness and what do I see ?? the black cocker has determined this to be a magnificent cologne that may even cover his breath of death and proceded to roll in it. Ahh you should have seen the bliss on his lil doggy face and the groans of absoulute pleasure.... Here comes Mom armed with doggy deo...squirt, squirt...hey wait now he smells like a turd microwaved....oops wrong spray. Used Stayaway, another nostril assulting compound made to drive visitors away. hence the name...
Posted on: Sun, 29 Sep 2013 18:26:09 +0000
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