THE APOLOGY They beat me and I called you to save me ... but you couldnt.. so I secretly resented you. They took our babies and sold them, I begged you to save us.. but you couldnt .. so I secretly blamed you.. They raped me, and I cried out for you to protect me... but you couldnt.....So I stopped trusting you... You were supposed to be my man.. my provider.. my protector but when I needed you.. you couldnt be there... so I hated you... How could I let you tell me what to do. When massa could protect me more than you.. How could I submit to you when you are forced to submit to massa? So to protect myself I submitted to the one who could protect me and our children. I stopped trusting you.. I stopped loving you.. I stopped honoring you.. I stopped valuing you and in turn I became valueless to you. I didnt see the frustration in your eyes when our children were sold.. I didnt hear your silent cries when I was beaten. I didnt see your anger when I was being ravished.. I didnt understand that you held your emotions to be strong for me.. I thought you didnt care.. but you wanted to be there...you wanted to protect me.. you wanted to .... but massa made it so you couldnt so I would trust him more than you. I didnt see the hidden hands shaping our destiny.. all I saw was my pain.. and the feeling that you neglected me.. For all the times I blamed you, Im sorry For the resentment and distrust Ive held against you for centuries.. Im sorry For the times Ive let you down For all the times Ive broken your spirit with my words and my actions. For the times I openly rejected you.. and tried to control you .. because I thought less of you.. Im sorry.. Massa had a plan.. that he said would work for 400 years.. 400 years is over now. My eyes are wide open... .. I see the king in you... Please forgive my wrongs and see your queen in me. POETRY By KhaYah (Aisha Williams)©
Posted on: Mon, 05 Jan 2015 01:48:15 +0000
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