THE SPEECH THAT SACHIN DID NOT GIVE Cricket crazy India came to a standstill when Sachin Tendulkar [ST] gave his now memorable and straight—from—the—heart speech at the end of his 200 th and last ever Test match last week. I am sure his speech will be part of text books . But few know of another speech that ST allegedly got his ghost writer to write but which he did not deliver. I got the text of this undelivered speech courtesy my indefatigable first rate private detective the Sachin Teudulkar of his secret profession viz Alphonso . I am told that Sachin read the text of this speech hours before his now famous party for Mumbai celebrities . Contrary to Sachin’s ability to unflinchingly face the bouncers hurled at him by the likes of Shoab Akhtar, Alan Donald and Mcgrath the draft speech left ST stunned in silence. He developed cold feet and discarded the draft. . I may be the only guy other than my beloved Alphonso[ the expert hacker] to have access to the draft and I share this with my readers who will have to send me an undertaking to the effect that they will not pelt me with stones should they ever accost me. Here is the draft : I am deeply honoured by all the love shown to me over the years by cricket lovers all over the world. In particular I am totally moved by the way our otherwise taciturn Prime Minister called me up to inform me about the conferment of the nation’s highest civilian honour the Bharat Ratna . I hope a PIL is not filed against this honour being conferred by me on the grounds that I being a honorary Group Captain in the Indian Air Force am not a civilian !! My friends tell me that even if such a PIL is filed , my Congress party friends will get me a Param Vir Chakra in view of the many battles I have valiantly fought on the cricket field. I am thrilled but I must take this occasion to turn down the many privileges that are given to a Bharat Ratna. I don’t know if you are aware but the privileges are enough to add an enormous burden to a groaning exchequer . Consider this—I have enough money to buy my own Dreamliner aircraft but as a ‘Bharat Ratna’ I and my family can travel FREE to any part of India any number of times . I hereby humbly request the Government to withdraw this facility.I will take care of my travel expenses myself. I have told this several times but some people simply do not listen out of love for me . I am not so sure about actress Khushboo but I am definite I am a human being and as such I request those guys in Bihar NOT to build a temple with me as the Presiding deity . As for Dhoni and Yuvi who are the other ‘ smaller deities’ in this proposed temple I leave it to them to announce their status—man or god!! I have received a request to be present at the consecration ceremony of this temple but since I have not bothered to be present let alone speak at the Rajya Sabha of which I am a member I cannot possibly travel to Bihar for this function even though I can fly free. [ I am afraid I cannot reveal the rest of the speech .Some people are already pelting stones at me . They have hacked my computer even as I am writing this piece. It is time hackers are punished severely]. K.R.RAVI WWW.KRRAVI.COM
Posted on: Thu, 21 Nov 2013 11:15:04 +0000
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