The Rowdy and Bawdy Adventures Of Jack Mormon, Dirty Sanchez & Captain Morgan Starring Ben Affleck as Jack Mormon Matt Damon as Dirty Sanchez Cole Hauser as Captain Morgan Co Starring Casey Affleck as Nicolai Tesla Robin Williams as Thomas Edison David Schwimmer as Jim Bowie Mathew Perry as Davy Crocket Christopher Walken as Orville Redenbacher Sir Anthony Hopkins as The Red Baron John Neville as Baron Von Munchausen Jeremy Irons as Claus Von Bulow Cheech Marin as General Santa Anna Edward James Olmos as Jose Cuervo Jimmy Smits as Don Diego Miguel Ferrer as San Juan Capistrano Mel Gibson as Captain Cortez AND ALSO STARRING Madonna as Madonna Sandra Bernhard as Calamity Jane Rosie O’Donnell as Annie Oakley Gwen Stefani as Mae West Sarah Michelle Gellar as Pocahontas Keira Knighty as Saquageawa Robert De Niro as Louis Cifer Dougrey Scott as Prince o’ Darkness Vaughn Scott as The Anti Christ Devils Child Ronnie James Dio as The Devil Alice Cooper as Himself Ozzy Osbourne as Himself Shannon Dougherty as Herself Paris Hilton as Herself And in the announcing booth Howard Stern And Rush Limbaugh Color Commentary and Play by Play And Steve Buscemi as Jesus Christos and Jesus Christ Leo De Caprio as Brigham Young Denzel Washington as Joseph Smith Will Smith as The Fresh Prince Eddie Murphy as George Washington Carver Cameron Diaz as Eleanor Rosevelt Jeanne Garafalo as Martha Washington Cheri O Teri as Old Mother Hubbard Tina Fey as Mrs. Pulitzer Jimmy Fallon as Mr. Pulitzer William Ferrel as Nobel Laurette Kevin Smith as Silent Bob Jason Mewes as Jay Jeff Daniels as Jack Daniels Jim Belushi as Jim Beam Juergin Prochnow as Jaeger Meister Hannah Graff and Heidi Klum as Rumple and Mintz Mike Myers as Yukon Jack The Barbi Twins as Malibu Rum Glen Close as Cruella De Ville Roseanne Barr as Coup De Ville Martin Mull as Great Chief Thunderbird Jeff Goldblum as Great Chief Pontiac Ian Gary as Great Chief Plays in Wrong Hole Bret McDonnell as Great Chief Runs With His Cock Christian Vance as Great Chief Small Braves Run In Fear Kevin Costner as Dances With Wolves And Marry MacDonald is Stands With A Fist INTRODUCING Ashley Carpi as Indian Chieftess Balls Rest On Nose With Sunrise Adams as Indian Chieftess Nuts Rest On Chin Ted Danson as George Westinghouse Danniel Devito as Eli Pratt Woody Harrelson is Alexandre Graham Bell Julia Louis Dreyfus as Clara Barton Martha Stewart as Betsy Ross Jerry Seinfeld as Henry Ford Jason Alexandre as Stewart Edsel Michael Richards is GTO, Gary Theordore Octavian Playing Themselves General Electric General Atomic General Motors James Gandolphini as General Grant Kevin Spacey as General Lee Steve Martin as General Patton Chevy Chase as General Omar Bradley Brad Pitt as Colonel Mustard George Clooney as Colonel Custard Eddie Izzard as Colonel Tapioca Don Cheadle as Lt. Green Jello Lee Emery as Private Lemon Knox Angelina Jolie as Sgt Major DSL Omar Epps as Jackie Owens Larry Fishburne as Fredrick Douglas Halle Berry as Aunt Jemima Oprah Winfrey as Bre’Rabbit Richard Bey as Bre’ Fox Dr. Phil as Bre’ Bear Tom Cruise as Tom Thumb John Hurt IS John Merrick Lucy Liu and “The Chick from the View” are Chang and Yang Vince Vaughn as Johnny Appleseed John Faverou as The Miner Forty Niner Jenifer Aniston as Susan Sarandon Freddy Prinze Jr is Barry Bostwick Rose McGowan is Magenta Brittney Snow is Columbia Ashton Kutcher is Riff Raff Michael Steinman is Eddie “Some Calvin Klein Underwear Model!” is Rocky AND AS ALWAYS AND ALWAYS WILL BE!!!!!! TIM CURRY! AS Dr. Franken Furter Courtney Cox as Sally Field Johnny Knoxville is “Snow Man” David Arquette is “The Bandit” Andy Sanberg is “Sheriff Bufford T. Justice” Bill Hader is “Jr” Lisa Kudrow as Dolly Parton Reese Witherspoon is Jane Fonda Christina Ricci as Lilly Tomlin Jon Heder as Dabny Coleman Bruce Willis is The President of the Hair Club For Men Demi Moore is Queen Alimony Cybil Sheppard is Little Bo Peep Kyle MacLachlan is or was a least with Linda Evangelista And he’s the Kitzark Hadarach, “THE UNIVERSES SUPREME BEING!” NOT TO MENTION DALE COOPER! Is that a baby elephant trunk in his pants? Edward Norton is “Dr. Bruce Banner, “Tyler Dirdin” NEXT UP “Dr. Strange” John Travolta is “Grease Lightning!” “Danny Zucko is God!” Stockard Channing is “Rizzo!” Scott Conway is “Kinike” And Olivia Newton John, Kylie Minogue, Nicole Kidman, Guy Pierce, Russel Crowe and Paul Hogan ARE AUSTRALIA! Keanu Reeves IS JOHNNY UTAH And Patrick Swayze is “What ever the guy in Road House was called?” I REST MY CASE! “The Rowdy and Bawdy Adventures of Jack Mormon, Dirty Sanchez, and Captain Morgan” The Rowdy and Bawdy Adventures Of Jack Mormon, Dirty Sanchez & Captain Morgan Starring Ben Affleck as Jack Mormon Matt Damon as Dirty Sanchez Cole Hauser as Captain Morgan Co Starring Casey Affleck as Nicolai Tesla Robin Williams as Thomas Edison David Schwimmer as Jim Bowie Mathew Perry as Davy Crocket Christopher Walken as Orville Redenbacher Sir Anthony Hopkins as The Red Baron John Neville as Baron Von Munchausen Jeremy Irons as Claus Von Bulow Cheech Marin as General Santa Anna Edward James Olmos as Jose Cuervo Jimmy Smits as Don Diego Miguel Ferrer as San Juan Capistrano Mel Gibson as Captain Cortez AND ALSO STARRING Madonna as Madonna Sandra Bernhard as Calamity Jane Rosie O’Donnell as Annie Oakley Gwen Stefani as Mae West Sarah Michelle Gellar as Pocahontas Keira Knighty as Saquageawa Robert De Niro as Louis Cifer Dougrey Scott as Prince o’ Darkness Vaughn Scott as The Anti Christ Devils Child Ronnie James Dio as The Devil Alice Cooper as Himself Ozzy Osbourne as Himself Shannon Dougherty as Herself Paris Hilton as Herself And in the announcing booth Howard Stern And Rush Limbaugh Color Commentary and Play by Play And Steve Buscemi as Jesus Christos and Jesus Christ Leo De Caprio as Brigham Young Denzel Washington as Joseph Smith Will Smith as The Fresh Prince Eddie Murphy as George Washington Carver Cameron Diaz as Eleanor Rosevelt Jeanne Garafalo as Martha Washington Cheri O Teri as Old Mother Hubbard Tina Fey as Mrs. Pulitzer Jimmy Fallon as Mr. Pulitzer William Ferrel as Nobel Laurette Kevin Smith as Silent Bob Jason Mewes as Jay Jeff Daniels as Jack Daniels Jim Belushi as Jim Beam Juergin Prochnow as Jaeger Meister Hannah Graff and Heidi Klum as Rumple and Mintz Mike Myers as Yukon Jack The Barbi Twins as Malibu Rum Glen Close as Cruella De Ville Roseanne Barr as Coup De Ville Martin Mull as Great Chief Thunderbird Jeff Goldblum as Great Chief Pontiac Ian Gary as Great Chief Plays in Wrong Hole Bret McDonnell as Great Chief Runs With His Cock Christian Vance as Great Chief Small Braves Run In Fear Kevin Costner as Dances With Wolves And Marry MacDonald is Stands With A Fist INTRODUCING Ashley Carpi as Indian Chieftess Balls Rest On Nose With Sunrise Adams as Indian Chieftess Nuts Rest On Chin Ted Danson as George Westinghouse Danniel Devito as Eli Pratt Woody Harrelson is Alexandre Graham Bell Julia Louis Dreyfus as Clara Barton Martha Stewart as Betsy Ross Jerry Seinfeld as Henry Ford Jason Alexandre as Stewart Edsel Michael Richards is GTO, Gary Theordore Octavian Playing Themselves General Electric General Atomic General Motors James Gandolphini as General Grant Kevin Spacey as General Lee Steve Martin as General Patton Chevy Chase as General Omar Bradley Brad Pitt as Colonel Mustard George Clooney as Colonel Custard Eddie Izzard as Colonel Tapioca Don Cheadle as Lt. Green Jello Lee Emery as Private Lemon Knox Angelina Jolie as Sgt Major DSL Omar Epps as Jackie Owens Larry Fishburne as Fredrick Douglas Halle Berry as Aunt Jemima Oprah Winfrey as Bre’Rabbit Richard Bey as Bre’ Fox Dr. Phil as Bre’ Bear Tom Cruise as Tom Thumb John Hurt IS John Merrick Lucy Liu and “The Chick from the View” are Chang and Yang Vince Vaughn as Johnny Appleseed John Faverou as The Miner Forty Niner Jenifer Aniston as Susan Sarandon Freddy Prinze Jr is Barry Bostwick Rose McGowan is Magenta Brittney Snow is Columbia Ashton Kutcher is Riff Raff Michael Steinman is Eddie “Some Calvin Klein Underwear Model!” is Rocky AND AS ALWAYS AND ALWAYS WILL BE!!!!!! TIM CURRY! AS Dr. Franken Furter Courtney Cox as Sally Field Johnny Knoxville is “Snow Man” David Arquette is “The Bandit” Andy Sanberg is “Sheriff Bufford T. Justice” Bill Hader is “Jr” Lisa Kudrow as Dolly Parton Reese Witherspoon is Jane Fonda Christina Ricci as Lilly Tomlin Jon Heder as Dabny Coleman Bruce Willis is The President of the Hair Club For Men Demi Moore is Queen Alimony Cybil Sheppard is Little Bo Peep Kyle MacLachlan is or was a least with Linda Evangelista And he’s the Kitzark Hadarach, “THE UNIVERSES SUPREME BEING!” NOT TO MENTION DALE COOPER! Is that a baby elephant trunk in his pants? Edward Norton is “Dr. Bruce Banner, “Tyler Dirdin” NEXT UP “Dr. Strange” John Travolta is “Grease Lightning!” “Danny Zucko is God!” Stockard Channing is “Rizzo!” Scott Conway is “Kinike” And Olivia Newton John, Kylie Minogue, Nicole Kidman, Guy Pierce, Russel Crowe and Paul Hogan ARE AUSTRALIA! Keanu Reeves IS JOHNNY UTAH And Patrick Swayze is “What ever the guy in Road House was called?” I REST MY CASE! “The Rowdy and Bawdy Adventures of Jack Mormon, Dirty Sanchez, and Captain Morgan”
Posted on: Thu, 31 Oct 2013 20:36:09 +0000
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