The Way They Were- 11/24/56 Fifty-eight years ago today Patty Jordan and Dick Reilly got married. The day was picture perfect- bright and sunny and just cold enough. The bride was lovely in white and the groom cut a handsome figure in a morning suit with striped trousers. The guests arrived, mass was celebrated, vows were said and promises were made, rings slid on and it was all sealed with a kiss. The beaming newlyweds made their way down the aisle and out into the world- truly together. The last anniversary celebrated by both my parents was in 2007 on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Mom was very sick and could not fully appreciate the day’s meaning-but we carried on with cheer that she did enjoy. It was one of many bittersweet moments we had that autumn and we wore our game faces even though our hearts were breaking. Mom was gone before Christmas and life changed forever. This is the point where I can go one of two ways by staying on the path of wistful melancholy or instead I can take a sharp left and tell you a little about big pants, a snarky attitude, and the church that was a backdrop for the biggest crime of the century. Hmmmm.....let’s go with what’s behind Curtain #2. My father loves to tell the story about the pants he wore at his wedding. He was (and still is) thin- and when the suits arrived at his house and the groomsmen divvied things up-the groom’s trousers were HUGE! Dad put them on and when he let go they puddled around his feet. My grandmother quickly grabbed her sewing kit and managed to cinch the waistband at the back with pins and light basting. Meanwhile someone called the store the suits had been rented from only to find out that the robust gentleman who needed the 46 pants had gotten my dad’s size 32. There was no time to make a change and no amount of stitch witchery could expand a waistline 14 inches. Dad has always chuckled about this- and hoped that the other wedding that morning went off on time with the groom in trousers that fit. Mom grew up in a single parent home. In the 1930s divorce was uncommon and her parents just lived separately. Grandma Jo was a seamstress and dressmaker for individual clients as well as Saks, Bonwit Teller, and B. Altman. My grandfather, a Johns Hopkins graduate and a WWI veteran was her senior by 20 years- and he specialized in real estate, boozy camaraderie, and playing cards- which he was not very good at. After a few years my grandfather took up residence elsewhere- so Mom and Grandma Jo lived in a small apartment in the Bronx. Although there was no legal recognition of the split, Grandma Jo took it upon herself to leave her husband off the wedding invitations- giving the impression that she was a widow. Of course when Grandpa showed up and walked Mom down the aisle – well, there were some very surprised folks. Point made. All of this behind-the-scenes drama took place at St. Raymond’s Catholic Church in the Bronx. St. Raymond’s already had played a role in a dark and disturbing situation- the Lindbergh kidnapping case. On April 2, 1932 Charles Lindbergh drove to the church with $50,000 to meet an intermediary who then gave it to “John” who was waiting in the graveyard. John was supposed to reveal the location of Charles Jr. but it was a hoax. The lead given to the distraught father started a massive law enforcement search over Martha’s Vineyard that yielded nothing. While St. Raymond’s is but a footnote in a notorious case it was and is a thriving parish that serves and celebrates its parishioners and their lives. It was at St. Raymond’s that my Mom went to school, made friends, and eventually got married. Shortly before 10:00 am 58 years ago today there was a happily nervous bride who was worried about – well- everything! The dress, her hair, the veil…! The groom was excited and goofing around with his buddies (being careful of his pants)- making sure someone had the rings. They were a young couple on the precipice of merging lives. Happy, silly, hopeful, and anxious…just like so many brides and grooms embarking on the adventure that is marriage. This was not the way I knew my parents – but it was the way they were. I love knowing that.
Posted on: Mon, 24 Nov 2014 04:44:31 +0000
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