The following are actual church bulletin board bloopers found in churches across the United States: Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church. Evening massage - 6 p.m. The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning. The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession. Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door. Ushers will eat latecomers. The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment. For those of you who have children and dont know it, we have a nursery downstairs. The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience. The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, Break Forth Into Joy. During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit. Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on Its a Terrible Experience. Due to the Rectors illness, Wednesdays healing services will be discontinued until further notice. Stewardship Offertory: Jesus Paid It All The music for todays service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeares Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy. The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the ministers daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her. Twenty-two members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs. Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs. Crutchfield and Mrs. Rankin sang a duet, The Lord Knows Why. A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday. Todays Sermon: HOW MUCH CAN A MAN DRINK? with hymns from a full choir. Hymn 43: Great God, what do I see here? Preacher: The Rev. Horace Blodgett Hymn 47: Hark! An awful voice is sounding On a church bulletin during the ministers illness: GOD IS GOOD Dr. Hargreaves is better. Potluck supper: Prayer and medication to follow. Dont let worry kill you off - let the church help. The 1997 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11. Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary. Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir. A new loudspeaker system has been installed in the church. It was given by one of our members in honor of his wife. Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan in preparing for the girth of their first child. :-) Now SHARE this to spread some Sunday smiles . . . And LIKE this page at The Easy Cajun if you have not joined us yet ;-)
Posted on: Sun, 01 Jun 2014 16:27:59 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015