These solitary nights of silence torment me so. The tick tock of the clock on the wall a relentless reminder of the time that is speeding by. This upcoming year my son will be thirteen years old, a teenager. At best I can expect maybe seven years before he will want and be ready to move out and start his own life. As much as this terrifies me I still have to teach and guide him so that he becomes a good man. That is the way it is supposed to be. Raising him is my only purpose, the one thing that I have ever done right in this world, the only value that I could ever see in myself. Once that has come to be however I will be nothing, just as I was before I got pregnant. I don’t have a mate to share my soul with, my body no longer has the ability to conceive another child, so what am I to do seven years down the line when this life of mine becomes useless. The future that I see myself in is not one I want to experience. Most people speak of how they fear death, but I fear that I am going to live. youtu.be/-yabgCD-AQ4
Posted on: Fri, 19 Dec 2014 09:03:44 +0000
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