This is my first day at home after chemo, and last night I woke up and couldnt remember (ahhhh-gain!) what was wrong with me. But one thing I could remember was to Fight like a Diva. Since I couldnt remember what I was fighting for, I started praying again, God, help me remember, and help me to fight. I dont want to disappoint You or anyone else. Then I remembered. I have to go to the bathroom, and if that means the bedside potty then put aside your embarrassment and be strong. My brother in law (who fell off a 24 ft house, then the house fell on him. His journey is more than amazing and he and and my sister-in-law, Paulia Merrell, have been so encouraging to me) has been saying all along, Melody Box, be brave. Be courageous. Just do it. You have to! So I remembered, I cant walk right now, but I can turn on a light and move to a potty seat. I felt pretty good until I had to do it a second time in the night. Then I felt bad for Phil Box having to wake up again (forgot to say, he has to help me back in bed because bed is so high - of course he would never complain). Honesty here: Didnt like it. I want to walk. I want to drive. I want to be independent. This morning, my most precious friend sent me the following: Trust Me here and now. You are in rigorous training-on an adventurous trail designed for you alone. This path is not of your choosing, but it is My way for you. I am doing things you cant understand. That is why I say, Trust Me! The jungle is thick, and you cannot clearly see what is before you, behind you, or beside you. Cling to My hand as you follow this trail in shadowy darkness. Although you cannot see Me, My Presence with you is rock-solid reality. Find hope in Me, beloved, for I am taking care of you. Focus on enjoying Me and all that I am to you-even though your circumstances scream for resolution. Refuse to obsess about your problems and how you are going to fix them. Instead, affirm your trust in Me; wait hopefully in My Presence, and watch to see what I will do. Who among you fears the Lord and obeys the word of his servant? Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God. -Isaiah 50:10 Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him for the help of His presence. -Psalm 42:5 nasb Therefore I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me. -Micah 7:7 nkjv Sent from Elizabeths iPhone Thank you Elizabeth. And thank you to so many who are continuing to pray for me and Phil!
Posted on: Wed, 19 Nov 2014 17:01:30 +0000
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