??? This is starting to give me the creeps. All of my tests are coming back normal. Crisis psych-eval (for now its bipolar until investigated further, but it never really felt right to me as a diagnosis, it was always more or less) isnt turning up anything peculiar straightaway. All my physical tests, vital signs, blood/urine analysees (?) come back fine always. I can go in feeling like I am actually dying and everything shows up fine on tests. Ive been off opioid pain killers for three weeks now and my health is getting worse in every way. There is literally no answer to be found, and attempting to go through the health care system, mental health care in particular, is a really jarring experience that I take great pains to avoid when possible. Ive adjusted my perspective and my ego is basically dead, or has been subordinated by higher authorities of all kinds at least for now. As much as I try to be a rational person to dodge any not-being-taken-seriously-because-of-x pitfalls, every sign indicates that I will never have answers, its a very frightening way to exist and does my mental health no favors. My spirituality is already stunted and atrophied quite a lot currently from being in survival mode and fight-or-flight at all times, I tried re-adjusting my priorities and putting everything that isnt my health and responsibilities on the back burner, and things arent different. I know this is a long shot but I need help from those who are extraordinarily capable of thinking outside the box. I cant afford to get further diagnostic procedures done to try and pin-point the source of my extreme physical and psychological pain and suffering, and theyd most likely come back negative anyhow because this is looking less and less like a physical problem. Having the feeling that Im somehow cursed in a way that renders me unable to be helped or believed by anybody is making me progressively more of an isolated, paranoid person. So Im wondering if theres some sort of community-specific diagnostic workup of possible spiritual anomalies/enigmas to be further investigated?? This is literally insane to me. >__
Posted on: Sat, 07 Jun 2014 04:22:36 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015