To my baby that died. This is for you: I’ll never forget how excited I was when I found out I was pregnant with you. I went and bought you everything brand new. Finally I was going to be a mom, and my dream was coming true. I couldn’t wait to finally meet you. I was 3 months along when I went to see your heartbeat on the ultrasound. Your daddy and grandma were hovered all around. My mom asked the doctor if she found the heartbeat in an optimistic manner. I could instantly tell that something was the matter. The doctor looked pale with fear, That’s when I said there is no heartbeat is there? My doctor quickly began to cry. I must admit so did I. My soul was immediately ripped apart. You were my everything…You were my heart. The doctor did an extensive ultrasound to find out when you died. I honestly didn’t need to know when, I just wanted to know why. Now I realize why there was no birth. You are too perfect to ever come to earth. I will always feel like somehow I am the one to blame. I know no matter what I’ll never be the same. Everyone says with time it will get better. But it’s been 2 years and I know it’s going to hurt forever. Even when a friend tells me that she’s going to have a baby, I often wish that I was that lady. When I see a movie and the baby dies, I think of you and I begin to cry. One day when we meet in heaven my thoughts will no longer dwell. But I will never forget the day you died on February 1st 2012.
Posted on: Thu, 03 Apr 2014 21:54:55 +0000
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