Today, I had to let my baby go to the pound. It had to be done, we couldnt take her with us, and I tried everything I could to find her a new home. So, I wrote this to try to show that not everybody who takes their furbabies to the pound are neglectful, heartless, people (though I feel as bad as one right now). Sometimes, you dont have any other choice even though it rips your heart out. It’s been more than a few months now since Daddy’s work went down. At first we didn’t worry, we knew the hours would come around. But, the bills piled up slowly, most of them fell behind. Before we knew what was happening we had ran out of time. And so we have to leave and find somewhere new. We can take everything, everything but you. I didn’t accept it at first that I would be losing my dog. I believed that something would sooner or later come along. But, the hard reality hit when I had to load you into the car. Your tail starting wagging; I’m sure you thought we weren’t going far. It took me thirty minutes to make a five minute drive. I couldn’t see the road for the tears streaming from my eyes. And every time I pulled over to pull you close to me, You’d lick and nudge as if saying, “What’s wrong, Mommy?” I tried so hard to find a new home for you to go, I even offered to forever pay your food and vet but everyone said no. And so when we finally pulled into the lot at the local animal shelter, I pulled you close and through tears, I whispered, “Please, remember. Remember that I love you and this is not your fault. This is all on me, Baby, this is all Mommy’s fault. I should have tried harder, I should have found a way. But, it’s too late now, Baby, today is the final day. I love you so much, girl, and this killing me. This isn’t fair to you and I hope you can forgive me. Now, listen, Baby, listen to Mommy. Be on your best behavior and be nice to everybody. Don’t jump or bark or scratch when people walk by. Show them what a good girl you are, don’t let them think you’re shy. I pray that someone takes you home and takes you into their heart. I pray that they give you what you had before it all fell apart.” The time has come, now, I can’t stall anymore. I hug and kiss you one more time before opening up your door. You jump out and in we go, inside those concrete walls. You wag your tail slowly, now, you know something’s wrong. I hand you over to the lady with the clipboard in her hand. I can barely write out your name my hands are shaking so bad. Her eyes are accusing as I hand it back to her. I try to explain why but she doesn’t care for my words. She hands me your collar and the tags with your name. Then she tugs on your new leash and tries to lead you away. You don’t want to go, though. You tug, and pull, and sit. And then you stare at me and whine, and it feels like I’ve been hit. You’re gone from my sight now and I’m standing there alone. Holding your leash and collar and your tags shaped like a bone. I turn and make my way back out into the car. I sit there forever, crying, and thinking about where you are. Now, the night has come and I sit here with your bear. And all I think about is if you’re sad and scared. I close my bloodshot eyes, I pray to the Lord above: “Please, God, don’t let her die, please, God, let her find love.”
Posted on: Wed, 03 Sep 2014 06:03:45 +0000
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