Tonight, as a counter move to our temporarily hateful climate, I lit nearly every candle that I have (about 30, Id say) and made sure that I sat where I could see them all with one glance. I have managed, happily, to raise the temperature of the room by three full degrees. But something even better happened. I sat on the couch with the lamp behind me so that I could read without being blinded. The shade is made of paper, and there are little cuts and tears in it here and there, probably from sheer dry-rot. Through these cuts pass slivers of light from the clear bulbs behind the shade, and I took note of the patterns that the slivers made on my books pages as I turned them or shifted. I even began to tilt the book gradually, seeing how I could affect the length of the light shapes. It was then that I also noticed that every candle flame in the room appeared to be pulsing in perfect sync. Now, I dont know if that was actually the case, but it was pretty damn close and it dawned on me that I knew what was really happening: I was fully present--in my home, with my candles, my book, my music and the dancing lights. I noticed it all and cared not one damn for anything that was happening outside this place. I cannot tell you the last time I was this not-distracted. Its been too long and I have missed it like hell. It was beautiful.
Posted on: Wed, 16 Apr 2014 02:50:43 +0000
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