Tractorman and the Sand Trap Tractorman here. I mow where weeds grow, he said into the telephone, then took another swallow of the strong coffee he had earlier brewed to accompany his meager breakfast of Wheaties and skimmed milk. Oh, good, Im glad I finally got ahold of you. There was a pause. Tractorman quickly slurped a bite of soggy Wheaties from his spoon. Are you in the middle of something? the voice asked. Breakfast. Do you have weeds to mow, sir? I will eat... Tractorman said, slightly irritated. Well, I dont appreciate the orgulous attitude. Im sorry if I interrupted your meal. May I ask, who is this? Tractorman asked. I am Major Richard Richards, United States Air Force, Helicopter Forces Division. We need your assistance at Aqua Caliente State Park. You know the airport near there? Yes, I am familiar with the area. Do you need the airport graded? Tractorman asked and quickly slurped another spoonful of soggy Wheaties. We need you get one of our unmarked vehicles out from under a grounded unmarked, Black Ops helicopter. We have heard you have expertise in the area of aircraft. The pickup is under the helicopter? Yes. Its stuck. The driver tried to get out of the deep sand the truck slipped under and up against the copter. The driver is in deep ca-ca. I will be there in 2 hours, and dont blame the driver. He was only doing his job, Tractorman said. He lifted his bowl and drank the remaining milk and few lubricious Wheatie flakes from it. Two hours later he arrived at the airport. He began the grading beside the pickup. Deeper and deeper he dug into the soft sand as if he were digging a soft pickup grave beside the pickup. What are you doing? the Major asked when Tractorman stopped for a drink of water. Im building a sand trap for the pickup. One more pass, then you guys give the pickup a push toward the hole. It should slide away from the copter. I have graded it so you can then drive the pickup out of the hole. Tractorman made the last pass and watched as the men did what he had told them to do. Sure enough everything worked. The pickup slid into the so-called sand trap. The driver then carefully drove the pickup out of the hole. Tractorman, thank you! You have saved the day! Major Richard Richards exclaimed. All in a days work, Tractorman replied and loaded the tractor into his pickup. Is there any chance your helicopter can give me and my pickup a lift back home? he asked. Sorry, Tractorman, but instead take this envelope. It contains an unlimited credit card for gasoline, good for a year, yours for the duration, plus theres a small check as well. Tractorman opened the envelope and fingered the card. He looked at the check to see the amount. He gasped at the figure. Well worth the soggy Wheaties and extended odyssey into the desert. *orgulous (OR-gyuh-luhs) adjective: Haughty. ETYMOLOGY: From Old French orguill (pride). Earliest documented use: 1275. *lubricious (loo-BRISH-uhs) adjective:4. Smooth and slippery. ETYMOLOGY: From Latin lubricus (slippery, smooth). Ultimately from the Indo-European root sleubh- (to slide or slip), which also gave us slip, slop, sloop, sleeve, and lubricate. Earliest documented use: 1584. *odyssey (AH-duh-see) noun: A long eventful journey or experience. ETYMOLOGY: After Odysseus, whose 10-year wandering after the fall of Troy is described in Homers epic poem, the Odyssey. Earliest documented use: 1886. /\ cheers, de -- Copyright 2014, Richard Ellis -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- What can everyone do? Praise and blame. This is human virtue, this is human madness. -Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (October 15, 1844-August 25, 1900)
Posted on: Wed, 15 Oct 2014 16:21:15 +0000
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