‘Twas the Night Before Obamacare ‘Twas the night before Obamacare, and all through the House Not a democrat was stirring, not even their spouse; The website was “ready”, Sebelius made sure, In hopes that Affordable Healthcare soon would be there; The liberals were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of policies danced in their heads; My wife had stopped crying, I felt like a sap, We had tried to settle down for a long winter’s nap, After discovering in the mail, earlier that day, Our policy was canceled and taken away. Away to the computer, I flew like a flash, Logged on to Healthcare.gov, but alas, it had crashed. I stayed on all night, just hoping to know If daylight would bring the website aglow, When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, A news flash, a message to wait while it cleared. With Kathleen Sebelius, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment, it’s going to be fixed! More rapid than eagles the Democrats came, Obama whistled, and shouted and called them by name; “Now, Pelosi! now, Reid!, and Ol’ Bobbie Rush! On Sebelius! On Schumer! On, Wasserman-Schultz! To the top of IT, and on to the firewall! Now fix the website and dash away all!” As websites are tested before a rollout, Sebelius met with an obstacle and started to shout, So up to the House the Democrats flew, With a plea to Republicans not to say what they knew. And then with a twinkling, the Republicans huffed, Prancing, and pawing and shouting ‘Enough!’ As I drew my head, and was turning around, Obama appeared and came with a bound. He was dressed in a suit, from his head to his toes, And he spoke with a promise of what he did know, Don’t worry, we’ll fix it,” he said with a stutter. “By the end of December, all will be covered.” His eyes—how they twinkled! Like before the election, “Don’t worry,” he said. ”We’ll fix it by section.” His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, As he said repeatedly, “The enrollment will grow!” The pundits stumped on as they grinned through their teeth, At Ezekiel Emanuel’s arrogance and conceit, As he stated, quite plainly for everyone to hear, “We know better than you, why there’s nothing to fear.” He was revoltingly charming, a right jolly old elf, And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself; A wink of his eye and a twist of his head, Soon gave me to know I have everything to dread; He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work, And created a plan that would make everyone jerk. “We’ll require them to purchase a plan they don’t want, With taxes and fees and high costs that will haunt, to fundamentally change this country, you’ll see, And turn it into what we want it to be. We’ll give them services that appear as if they are free, And the freedom to live without morality.” And giving a nod, Obama arose; He sprang to the mic, and began with a prose, I heard him exclaim as he began to exit, “If you like your plan, I said you can keep it, As long as Sebelius and I and Pelosi redeem it.” Based upon The Night Before Christmas by Clement Clarke Moore or Henry Livingston 2013, Linda Herbst
Posted on: Fri, 29 Nov 2013 16:35:22 +0000
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