Update from Michael: For some crazy reason I though this would be easier than it is. I didnt think it was possible to hurt so deeply. Sometimes all I can do is weep and that doesnt help. Its all so surreal and I keep asking myself if this is really happening. Ive told all the kids one by one and it seems like my 6 year old and younger dont get it. I guess thats good. Its not like much is going to change since she has been in the hospital for the last 5 weeks. My oldest Micah 11 seems to be taking it pretty hard. He was so much like her and they got along so well. I just pray that I can be enough for them. I cant help but think about how our last few weeks together were the best of our marriage. We were so happy. We knew each other so well and we just enjoyed being together so much. I so grateful that I made time the day before to meet her for the sonogram and had lunch with her and Asher (3). My biggest fear is that the memories will fade too quickly. All I can say that you should cherish every moment together and make time for each other. And when you get upset about something think to yourself, is it really that big of a deal? Our lives are like a mist here today and gone tomorrow. For all of you that knew Charlsie, no matter how long, I would be forever grateful if you could write her children a letter. Tell them of how their mom loved Jesus and how she influenced you in a good way. This will be something that they can read when they get older and start asking what was mommy like. The thought of my daughters getting married and not having her to teach them how to be such a wonderful wife, cuts to my very heart of hearts. You can take your time, even years if you want. Im guessing hand written letters would be best. Dont feel pressure to do it in any way. We will be having a memorial service for her on Saturday the 24th. Location and time TBA. It will be a time to honor an amazing woman and to thank God for the time we had with her. You are invited. We will be having a burial service on Tuesday, but Im thinking we will keep it simple. I will give updates as soon as I have them. Thank You all for your words of encouragement and your prayers. Ive told the LORD that Im so close to falling very hard and I can only be sustained by Him as He answers your prayers.
Posted on: Mon, 19 Jan 2015 03:30:19 +0000
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