Ways to keep the love of your husband.1. Behave like a female, i.e. all the tenderness of a female–a man doesn’t want a man for his wife!2. Don’t lay out all your problems on your husband as soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.3. Don’t keep asking him, “what are you thinking?”4. Stop nagging non-stop before Allah ta’ala gives you something really to complain about.5. Learn all the rights and obligations of each other in Islam. Focus on fulfilling your obligations, not demanding your rights.6. Keep your house clean, at least to the level that he wants it.7. Compliment him on the things you know he’s not so confident about (looks, intelligence, etc.) This will build his self-esteem.8. Tell him he’s the best husband ever.9. Call his family often.10. When he’s talking about something boring, listen and nod your head. Even ask questions to make it seem like you’re interested.11. Encourage him to do good deeds.12. If he’s in a bad mood, give him some space. He’ll get over it, ins ha Allah.13. Thank him sincerely for providing you with food and shelter. It’s a big deal.14. If he’s angry with you and starts yelling, let him yell it out while you’re quiet. You will see your fight will end a lot faster. Then when he’s calm, you can tell him your side of the story and how you want him to change something.15. When you’re mad at him, don’t say “YOU make me furious”, rather, “This action makes me upset”. Direct your anger to the action and circumstance rather than at him.16. Remember that your husband has feelings, so take them into consideration.17. If your husband is annoyed over a little thing you do (and you can control it), then stop doing it. Really.18. Learn how to tell him what you expect without him having to guess all the time. Learn to communicate your feelings.19. Don’t get mad over small things. It’s not worth it.20. Tell him you’re the best wife ever and compliment yourself on certain things you know you’re good at.21. Learn to make his favorite dish.22. Don’t ever, EVER talk bad about him with friends or family unnecessarily. If they end up agreeing with you, you will see that it hits you back in the face because you get more depressed that you have a bad husband–and other people also think you have a bad husband.23. Do all of the above fee sabeelillah and you will see Allah put barakah in everything you do.24. Husband and wife should discuss and communicate with wisdom with each other to convey what they like and dislike of each other to do or not to do. Do NOT give commands or instructions like he’s your servant. “They are garment to each other” [Surah Baqarah, 2:187]25. Tell your husband you love him, many, many times. Aisha narrated that the Prophet (PBUH) used to ask her how strong her love for him, she said like “a knot.” And the next time he would ask her, “How is that knot?” He also used to reply to her saying, “Jazzakillah, O Aishah, wallahi, you have not rejoiced in me as I have rejoiced in you.”26. Refine and cultivate good mannerisms i.e do not whine, don’t laugh or talk too loud or walk like an elephant.27. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.28. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.29. Don’t discuss important/controversial matters with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find right time for right discussion.30. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. lol31. Always let him know that you appreciate him working and bringing home the “dough”. It makes it easier for him to go to work.32. Make sure you ALWAYS have something for dinner.33. Brush your hair, everyday and your teeth too.34. Don’t forget to do laundry.35. Try (hard as it might be) to take interest in his hobbies.36. Try not to go shopping too much … and spend all his money.37. Surprise him with gifts. Even necessities, such as new shoes, can be gifts.38. Learn tricks and “techniques” to please your husband in intimacy. (Of course goes both ways.)39. Prepare for special evenings with him with special dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).40. Take care of your skin, especially your face. The face is center of attraction.41. If you not satisfied intimately, talk to him and tell him. Help him or provide resources, don’t wait until matters become worse.42. Ask Allah to strengthen and preserve the bonds of compassion and love between the two of you, every day, every prayer. Ask him to protect that bond from Shaytaan. When a lesser devil destroys the love between spouses, he is the most beloved of Shaytaan. Nothing works like du’ah, and love only exists between spouses where Allah instills it.43. Don’t EVER compare your husbands to other husbands! For example don’t say, “well her husband doesn’t do that, why do you ” (thats a killer!)44. Be happy with what you have because no one is perfect. If you want perfection, wait until you enter Jannah together inshaAllah–and of course, vice versa!45. Strive for Allah’s love first and foremost! if all wives try to seek Allah’s love and pleasure, surely, they can keep their husbands love too. And remember–if Allah loves you, the angels will love you, and the entire creation will love you.46. If you pack a lunch for your husband to take to work, from time to time sneak in a little love note or sweet poem. If he doesn’t take a lunch, leave the note somewhere else for him to find, like in his briefcase, or wallet or on the car steering-wheel47. Wake him up for Qiyam ul-Layl (in the last third of the night) and ask him to pray with you.May Allah preserve all of our marriages and help us understand and implement them in and with the best of manners, Ameen! A womans dua for her future husband: O Allah! Please grant me the one Who will be the garment for my soul Who will satisfy half of my deen And in doing so make me whole Make him righteous and on your path In all hell do and say And sprinkle water on me at Fajr Reminding me to pray May he earn from halal sources And spend within his means May he seek Allahs guidance always To fulfill all his dreams May he always refer to Quran and the Sunnah as his moral guide May he thank and appreciate Allah For the woman at his side May he be conscious of his anger And often fast and pray Be charitable and sensitive In every possible way May he honor and protect me And guide me in this life And please Allah! Make me worthy to be his loving wife And finally, O Allah! Make him abundant in love and laughter In taqwa and sincerity In striving for the hereafter! May Allah grant all the Muslim sisters with such husbands... Ameen! Dear sisters listen to this advice Abd al-Malik (Radiyallaahu anhaa) said: When ‘Awf ibn Muhallim al-Shaybani, one of the most highly respected leaders of the Arab nobility during the jahiliyyah, married his daughter Umm Iyas to al-Harith ibn ‘Amr al- Kindi, as she was made ready to be taken to the groom, her mother, Umamah came into her room to advise her and said: O my daughter, if it were deemed unnecessary to give you this advice because of good manners and noble descent, then it would have been unnecessary for you, because you posses these qualities, but it will serve as a reminder to those who are forgetful, and will help those who are wise. O my daughter, if a woman were able to do without a husband by virtue of her fathers wealth and her need for her father, then you of all people would be most able to do without a husband, but women were created for men just as men were created for them. O my daughter, you are about to leave the home in which you grew up, where you first learned to walk, to go to a place you do not know, to a companion to whom you are unfamiliar. By marrying you, he has become a master over you, so be like a servant to him, and he will become like a servant to you. Take from me ten qualities, which will be a provision and a reminder for you: The first and second of them are: be content in his company, and listen to and obey him, for contentment brings peace of mind, and listening to and obeying ones husband pleases Allah. The third and fourth of them are: make sure that you smell good and look good; he should not see anything ugly in you, and he should not smell anything but a pleasant smell from you. Kohl is the best kind of beautification to be found, and water is better than the rarest perfume. The fifth and sixth of them are: prepare his food on time, and keep quiet when he is asleep, for raging hunger is like a burning flame, and disturbing his sleep will make him angry. The seventh and eight of them are: take care of his servants (or employees) and children, and take care of his wealth, for taking care of his wealth shows that you appreciate him, and taking care of his children and servants shows good management. The ninth and tenth of them are: never disclose any of his secrets, and never disobey any of his orders, for if you disclose any of his secrets you will never feel safe from his possible betrayal, and if you disobey him, his heart will be filled with hatred towards you. Be careful, O my daughter, of showing joy in front of him when he is upset, and do not show sorrow in front of him when he is happy, because the former shows a lack of judgment whilst the latter will make him unhappy ♥ A Wife ♥ [Dont forget to share this article after reading] By getting married you are not just getting a wife, you are getting your whole world. From now until the rest of your days your wife will be your partner, your companion, and your best friend. She will share your moments, your days, and your years. She will share your joys and sorrows, your successes and failures, your dreams and your fears. When you are ill, she will take the best care of you; when you need help, she will do all she can for you; when you have a secret, she will keep it; when you need advice, she will give you the best advice. She will always be with you: when you wake up in the morning the first thing your eyes will see will be hers; during the day, she will be with you, if for some time she is not with you by her physical body, she will be thinking of you, praying for you with all her heart, mind, and soul; when you go to sleep at night, the last thing your eyes will see will be her; and when you are asleep you will still see her in your dreams. In short, she will be your whole world and you will be her whole world. The best description that I personally have ever read describing the closeness of the spouses to each other is the Quranic verse which says: They are your garments and you are their garments. (Surah Al Baqarah 2:187). Indeed, spouses are like garments to each other because they provide one another with the protection, the comfort, the cover, the support, and the adornment that garments provide to humans. Just imagine a journey in the winter of Alaska without garments! Our spouses provide us with the same level of comfort, protection, cover, and support in the journey of our lives on this earth as garments would do in the Alaskan journey. The relationship between the spouses is the most amazing of all human relations: the amount of love and affection, intimacy and closeness, mercy and compassion, peace and tranquillity that fills the hearts of the spouses is simply inexplicable. The only rational explanation for these most amazing of all human feelings is that: it is an act of Allah Subhanahu wa Taala, And Allah has made for you Mates (and Companions of your own nature ... (Surah Al Nahl 16:72) Only our Almighty Allah Subhanahu wa Taala in His Infinite Power, Boundless Mercy, and Great Wisdom can create and ingrain these amazing and blessed feelings in the hearts of the spouses. In fact Allah Subhanahu wa Taala is reminding those who search for His signs in the universe that these feelings in the hearts of the spouses are among the signs that should guide humans to His existence as He says in the Quran, And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquillity with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect. (Surah Al Rum 30:21) But Allah Subhanahu wa Taala knows that the human heart is not a static entity, it is sometimes weak and at times dynamic. Feelings can and do change with time. Love may wither and fade away. The marital bond might weaken if not properly cared for. Happiness in marriage cannot be taken for granted; continuous happiness requires constant giving from both sides. For the tree of marital love to remain alive and keep growing, the soil has to be sustained, maintained, watered and nurtured. Remember that our Prophet Muhammad Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam had found the time to go out to the desert and race with his wife Aisha. She outran him but later after she had gained some weight, he outran her. Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam took his wife to watch the young Ethiopians playing and dancing their folk dances. The show of emotions is necessary to keep the marital bond away from rusting and disintegrating. Remember that you will be rewarded by Allah Subhanahu wa Taala for any emotions you show to your wife as the Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam said One would be rewarded for anything that he does seeking the pleasure of Allah even the food that he puts in the mouth of his wife Never underestimate the importance of seemingly little things as putting food in your wifes mouth, opening the car door for her, etc. Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam used to extend his knee to his wife to assist her up to ride the camel. Try to always find some time for both of you to pray together. Strengthening the bond between you and Allah Subhanahu wa Taala is the best guarantee that your own marital bond would always remain strong. Having peace with Allah Subhanahu wa Taala will always result in having more peace at home. Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam gave glad tidings for those couples who wake up at night to pray together. The Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam even urged the spouse who rises up first to wake the other spouse up, even by splashing cold water on his/her face. Always try your best to be good to your wife by words and by deeds. Talk to her, smile to her, seek her advice, ask for her opinion, spend quality time with her and always remember that the Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam said, The best of you are those who are best to their wives Finally, it is common that spouses vow to love and honor their spouses until death do them part. I do believe that this vow is good or even great, but not enough! It is not enough that you love your wife. You have to love what she loves as well. Her family, her loved ones must also become your loved ones. Dont be like my colleague who was unhappy about his wifes parents coming to visit for few weeks. He candidly said to her I dont like your parents. Naturally she angrily looked at him straight in the eye and said, I dont like yours either. Also, it is not enough that you love her until death do you part. Love should never end and we do believe there is life after death where those who did righteousness in this world will be joined by their spouses (Surah Al Zukhruf 43:70) and offsprings. The best example in this regard is the Prophet Salallaahu aliahi wasallaam whose love for Khadija, his wife of 25 years, extended to include all those she loved; this love of his continued even after her death. It was many years after her death and he never forgot her and whenever a goat was slaughtered in his house he would send portions of it to Khadijas family and friends and whenever he felt that the visitor at the door might be Khadijas sister Hala, he would pray saying, O Allah let it be Hala. Dear Sisters ♥ Be careful who you make a friend.. They can help u towards hell or heaven. Good or bad. Between true happiness or remain utterly sad. Sisters if shes not good for your deen then why she in your team. Help one another towards the dream a place where eyes never seen Jannah. The real friend is not only the one with whom you laugh or eat, she is not only the one you enjoy to seat with, but the REAL FRIEND is the one who helps you to strengthen your Iman the moment you talk with her, who helps you to increase the account of your good deeds, who holds your hand to walk with you on the straight path, who always remembers you in her prayer without asking her to do it that is the real friend. A women in niqab is like a pearl in shell ♥ Once Flower met a Pearl. Flower:Our family is large;roses n daisies r members of d family.Thr r many havng distinctive scent,appearance etc.Suddenly, a tinge of distress appeared on flower. Pearl:Nothing 4sorrow in ur talk, thn y r depressed? Flower:Human deal wt us carelessly;not grow us4 our sake but2 get pleasure 4m our fragrance n beautiful appearance,n throw us on d street/garbage after using us.The flower sighed and said Tell 2me abt ur lyf! Hw do u feel it.U r buried in de bottom of de sea. Pearl:Although I hv none of ur distinctive colors/scents, humans think Im precious.They do the impossible 2procure me.I live in a thick shell isolated in de dark seas.However, Im happy n proud 2b in safe zone far 4m wanton n mischievous hands n still de humans consider me highly valuable. Think wht de Flower n de Pearl symbolize? The Flower is de unveiled woman(who shows her charms) & The Pearl is the veiled woman(who conceals her beauties) My Hijab... My Dignity I walk on the street with my head held high; everyone turns to look You eye me critically, wondering why I’m dressed like this. This is my hijab, my life and what I depend on. You don’t know a thing; you judge me from what you see. Why don’t you look deep within and see the person I am? I believe in my religion and I know my creator. Why don’t you look around and observe your surroundings; after all there is no painting without its artist. We see, smell and hear everything around us, but who gave us the ability to do so?
Posted on: Fri, 17 Oct 2014 09:04:53 +0000
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