We all have our not-so-proud moments. Yesterday I had mine. I was at a department store with my kids and when it came for my turn to check out I realized that my eldest son had removed an essential item from the cart. I asked the clerk if I could quickly go back to retrieve it. I ran back, leaving the kids and the cart up front, and was back in less than a minute. When I came up I was surprised to see that the clerk had taken the customer behind me and asked me to just step aside and wait for him. I had only two items and it would have been a very quick purchase but I couldnt do anything at that point so I followed his instructions and waited where he asked me to. After a minute or so, to my surprise I saw that customers who were standing behind me were being called to other clerks. My boys were tired and hungry and restless and I was annoyed at their obviously inefficient system, so I said something to one of the clerks who was standing nearby and making small talk with a coworker. She told me in a very matter of fact way to just wait for him and HE would help me. I complied but the customer had a cart full of things, and not just clothes but dishes that needed to be individually wrapped, paintings, rugs...she was basically refurnishing her entire house it seemed. After I witnessed two more customers called up, I finally caved and snapped. The manager was nearby and I explained my situation and said I didnt understand why I was asked to wait in a separate area when I hadnt even started my transaction yet; I could have just returned to the main line. She tried to explain what happened but then the other clerk who was curt with me interrupted and started talking over both of us. Needless to say, I rebutted and told her it was rude of her to interrupt me and that she could have helped me but she chose not to. The manager saw that things were beginning to escalate and abruptly hurried me over to another register. She didnt make any eye contact with me nor did she apologize or say anything. She just sprung into action and began ringing me up, trying to get me out of the store as fast as possible. Feeling completely denied any validation or respect, I became agitated with her as well and asked her if she had heard a single word I had said. She then very curtly said she had and was just trying to help me and do it quickly. I thanked her (begrudgingly) and left the store. Ugh. I was upset for so many reasons. I felt a desperate need for validation for the terrible customer service I was given but I was also feeling guilt... I should have been more patient, I shouldnt have complained, I should have set a better example as a hijabi (yes, this incident partly prompted my post from yesterday on hijab)... But wait a second, it wasnt my fault, THEY were totally unfair and rude and NOT helpful.. Why did they keep me waiting for nearly 10 minutes and allow others to go behind me? Thats not fair! Wow, that was a total fail. Because of me they will think all hijabis/Muslims are impatient and easily annoyed... These thoughts flooded me for another hour while I was out. I wasnt satisfied with myself because I know I could have handled it better, not just because Im a hijabi but because I strive to be a more patient and less reactionary person. I came home and thought about it some more continuing to fluctuate between states of guilt and injustice but after a short while decided to just brush it off and carry on with my tasks. Just as I was about to put things away I stopped in my tracks. It wasnt over. I walked right over to my laptop and looked up the telephone number to the store... Me: Hello, may I speak to the manager please? Clerk: Yes, one moment. Brittany: Hi, this is Brittany the store manager, how can I help you? Me: Hi Brittany, Im sorry to take your time, I am sure you are busy. I just wanted to speak to you for a moment. I came in about an hour ago and was wearing a headscarf and I wasnt very patient with you or your fellow employee and I want to sincerely apologize for that. I really felt awful for my impatience and my tone. I was just a bit stressed out and I took those frustrations out on you. I hope you can accept that. Brittany: Oh my God. I cannot believe you called back. That means SO much to me, you have no idea. This almost NEVER happens. Thank you so much. Dont even worry about it. It happens to the best of us. We also apologize for the inconvenience we caused you. Thank you again so much. Me: No problem! Please pass my apologies on to the other clerk as well and have a wonderful day. Thank you again! Me: I definitely will. Thank you...you too! Lessons: The same humanity that fails us is also capable of saving us if we want to be saved. We all have these two opposing forces: good and bad, conscience and ego, and we must choose in EVERY situation which of these forces leads our behavior and represents who we are. The choice really is ours. And if we slip, we must remember that its not a defining moment and we can always get back up by following our missteps with virtuous steps. May God accept our efforts. Ameen.
Posted on: Fri, 22 Aug 2014 04:39:23 +0000