Whats wrong? This. On a scale of severity of depressive symptoms between one to ten, I been feeling about an eight this past week or so. Among other things, it makes it very hard to act normal. My reserves of restraint are being spent on not harming myself; lesser impulses and nervous ticks are not worth the effort to restrain. You may see me limping, for instance, or twitching my hands. These symptoms are psychosomatic, I know this, but they show up none the less. It has been hard to communicate; lately, my words often taste like vomit in my mouth. What does escape can sound vague or alarming; this is indeed an effort to get attention; I feel a desperate need for care and support but am not always able to seek it in a mature and responsible manner. I want to be reassuring as possible; but I also want to share many thoughts and feelings that wouldnt be reassuring at all. I am going through an acute episode of a chronic illness. I am no more ashamed of that fact than I would be of having diabetes, or epilepsy. I take medication, which helps, and I have slowly learned ways to mitigate and cope with the pain. However, there are times, like now, when it just hurts. It is foe me to endure. I will do what I must to survive. So you may see me behaving a bit strangely.
Posted on: Fri, 20 Jun 2014 17:53:55 +0000
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