When I had first started dating a boy in my class, my teacher, to whom I was also an aid to, asked me one day How does he treat his female family members? To which I replied Good, he doesnt yell or start throwing things or try to hurt them. And how does he treat animals? Good, he doesnt yell at them either, and he doesnt throw things at them, and he doesnt try to hurt them. And if he had to be responsible for any of them and take care of them, and someone asked him to go to a three day concert instead, what would he do? I had to think about that. We had just come back from such a concert. Well, his family took care of his dog. Did he ask his family to or did he just assume they would? I didnt have an answer. So, I asked the boy at lunch who took care of his dog whilst we had been gone. They dont mind. But did you ask them first? Well, no. I mean, my Mom and Dad take off all the time without workin out any plans with us, and were left to take care of ourselves. About 3 months later, we were to go to a museum one Saturday as part of a class assignment. He never showed, and I had to get a ride from a friend. On Monday, I asked him why he never showed and why he hadnt called me back all weekend. My friends asked me to go hang out with them and I wanted to go to the car show, and car shows bore you. I figured youd get a ride to the Museum, have a good time? Sometime later, my teacher mentioned in passing one day that he had noticed that me and my boyfriend seemed to be no longer a couple. No, we arent. I broke off with him months ago I admitted. I noticed that how he treats his animals and family as a convenience, is exactly how he treated me. My teacher was not surprised, he nodded and smiled. Its a learned behaviour. And you learned a few things too I think. What do you mean? Sometimes my teacher, whom everyone loved for his humour and also for his hands on approach to helping his students, could be hard for us to figure out, because he made you think about the questions. I think you know already that just because you like someone a whole lot, doesnt mean you should stand by and accept how they treat you. Oh I totally know that already. And I think you know that neglect and convenience are not traits you want in someone you like a whole lot I nodded. Totally know that too And maybe you learned that its not okay for someone to blow off those same responsibilities to go to a concert with you too. Busted. I remember he laughed at my expression and said See, this is one of the perks of being a teacher. I get to share with my students all the times I also learned a lesson or two, just like the one you just learned. I miss Mr L. He was a good teacher.
Posted on: Tue, 06 May 2014 18:52:40 +0000
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