YOU BETRAYED YOURSELF Can you feel it? That emptiness? It hungers. It is an abyss and it seeks oblivion. It weeps into you a state of being beyond any conception of pain. It is the antitheses of feelings. It is totally devoid of any form of emotion. It shall consume you from within until all that remains of you is a vacuum of space clothed in flesh. You let this in. You welcomed it. You thought you were getting what you needed. It started with a small compromise. All you had to do was look the other way. A few white lies for another; cobwebs in a corner of a ceiling where no one would notice. Distract someone by keeping them busy, keeping them out of the way so certain other people wouldn’t see them. Maybe you got someone talking so a thief in the background could plunder the words and pass them off as their own to another person at later time. That was when the emptiness first manifested inside you. You knew it wasn’t right, but then came the next compromise. You were told to do what they wanted or your little indiscretion and the payment that came with it would be exposed. So you convinced yourself to go along with their demands. The emptiness grew within you. Your ethics and morals began to decay. After you met the terms of the demands you decided to step away. Have no more to do with what you helped put into play. With time to reflect you started to question yourself. Question what was going on. You started to ask questions. Suddenly, a new opportunity came your way or was it a new job offer that appeared, maybe a new friend with the same interests as you, or it might have been a new lover; whatever. It or they were bought and paid to keep you away; stop you from asking those questions. And you stopped asking those questions. You dismissed those questions. You laughed at those questions. And your life seemed so much better. Yet that emptiness inside of you kept growing. That emptiness that started as an itch became an annoying scratch turned into a need to gouge your flesh and you tried to deny it, ignore it. It wouldn’t go away. The emptiness kept growing as the happiness you told yourself you had revealed itself as lie. The emptiness had transformed. It transformed into a devouring abyss. So you turned around and returned. You decided you’d put things right. And what happened? Sweeten saccharine delight was placed in your path, colourfully wrapped in the whispers of your dreams being fulfilled. You swallowed it. The abyss within you began to suffocate all you once held to be true. You didn’t know what to do. The abyss was consuming you. Inside of you, that part of you, the best part of you cried out to you for help. Cried out you to turn back and reclaim yourself. Reclaim your fading morals and ethics, and breathe life back into them. It cried to you to stand up and fight the abyss within you; fight for that which is just. You continued to deny yourself. The abyss began to devour, it began to devour what made you, you. The best part of you wailed; wailed for help. It pleaded for you to save it. It pleaded for you to help save those you that had been wronged. It cried within you. Oh how it cried. It cried to you. What came next I cannot say. It is not my place speak of. That is for you to tell if you are still you and have not succumbed to the emptiness within the abyss inside you.
Posted on: Thu, 23 Jan 2014 22:35:45 +0000