Yesterday, I learned something. I learned something so important that my whole philosophy on life has changed. It was the day off on NLP Trainers Training, here in Thailand and I decided to get away from the crowd to get some headspace. I travelled south along the coast to a place called Khao Tao where I found a secluded beach named Sai Noi. There was a dishevelled shack that purported to sell food and drink with some rather dirty tables and chairs arranged outside. Not many, just a few. There was an old fishing boat sitting in the shallows with nets and ropes piled up on its small deck. There were ropes everywhere as if someone had just tangled them up and slung them on the boat. An old fisherman tended to his craft. The sea sparkled in the hot sun and the small waves created a hypnotic rhythm as they carressed the beach. I sat there and, initially my eyes were drawn to the sea scape – it was stunning – with the islands so becoming of Thailand sitting about a mile away. The world started to slow down and my attention was caught by the local Thai people arranging things in the shack and going about their everyday business. Their world, to me was initially chaotic. There were empty oil drums turned on their side, beer cases stacked untidily, awnings with holes in them tilted above their heads and the odd dog and cat wandering through the tables and chairs.There was nothing tidy about their world, nor clean, it just was the way it was and I became curious as to why they didnt organise the restaurant in a better way. The more I watched them and observed the shack the more I wanted to go over and tell them that if they cleaned the tables and tidied the place up and had a menu in English and fixed the awning they would get more customers. But, something was wrong. I started being more aware of the people working in the shack. I watched their faces and noticed how they interacted with each other. The lilting sounds of them speaking Thai drifted across the beach, sometimes animated and sometimes calm. I listened and watched and began to realise something. There was no trace of irritation or frustration in their voices. In fact, all I could ‘get’ was peace and calm and happiness. So be it, I thought. They are happy doing what they are doing and me trying to inflict my model of the world on them would not work. Of course this is what the western world are very good at – inflicting their model of the world on other people. The fisherman wandered up the beach and sat himself down on a chair next to mine.He greeted me in Thai and then settled himself down to stare across the ocean. He could speak a little english and we started to talk. I was interested in his way of life because it was, by this time 11am and he hadnt done a huge amount! We ordered a coffee from the shack and we talked. He told me that the fishing boat had been his fathers and was 50 years old (it looked older!) and he had been a fisherman since he was 14. Apparently he would go out fishing for a few hours every day and would return with his catch and sell some of it to the ‘shack restuarant’ and keep the rest for himself and his family for dinner. He would, on a good day make about £10. Why don’t you fish all day, I asked, then you could make more money. He smiled gently at my stupid question and waved at the sea. If I worked all day how would I have the time to enjoy the view? So, I asked him about where he lived and he waved in the direction of another little shack down the beach. It wasnt great to look at and I could see what I assumed to be his wife, hanging out the washing in front of it. So, I said to him, “surely if you worked a few more hours a day then you could have a better house” to which he replied in very broken English “why would I want that? A house is a house. A bigger house doesnt make you happy and I am happy now!” I studied his wizzened face and saw genuine peace. His energy was so tranquil and respectful. Here was a man who was truly happy. I looked across at the shack/restaurant and saw the same thing in the people working there. They were happy – happier than anyone you have ever come across. They were at peace with their lives. They did not care about materialistic things, they lived in the moment, appreciated their surroundings and enjoyed the happiness that was them. This was all a bit much for me, I was confused so I went for a walk. There were some steps up from the beach and I followed the steps up a dark trail totally enclosed by thick foliage. I climbed and climbed until suddenly, I broke into the sunlight and there, in front of me, on top of the hill, was a giant golden Buddha. It looked out over two bays of shimmering water, glistening in the midday sun. There were no sounds apart from the sounds of crickets chirping and I felt total peace. As I stood and looked at the view, I thought about everyone back in the UK, chasing the dollar. Everyone working all hours of the day to pay for their box (house). I thought about all the silly things in life we become obsessed about thinking that they will bring happiness and when we get them, we find they don’t. We rush around in the UK doing ‘important’ things, most of which have little or no chance of bringing happiness. In essence we are trying to exist until the time we die. They call Thailand the land of smiles for a reason. The Thai people are genuinely happy with their lot in life and their philosophy is, if we are good people and are happy then we will come back as something even better in the next life. They have time, in Thailand, because they make time. They sit and talk and observe their surroundings, They appreciate the beauty that surrounds them and, I mean, truly appreciate it. They are at one with the world. They have no interest in anything outside their little world because they cannot influence it, so why worry about it. They make enough Baht to eat and drink and when they have covered those small bills, the rest of the time is their own. They are not interested in flash cars and houses. Their philosophy is that ‘trying’ to make enough baht for those things would not be a happy process and would take them away from what they truly love……their life! So who has got it right? We in the UK or the local fisherman in Thailand. Certainly, I can say this for sure. I have never encountered anyone in the UK happier and more at peace than that wizzened old fisherman on that beach in Khao Tao. From the above you might think I am advocating that everyone should up sticks and go and sit on a hillside in Tibet. I am not. What NLP has taught me is awareness and how, sometimes you have to change your thinking to change your results. What NLP has also taught me is that whilst we all need to earn money, and some people like to have nice cars and houses, there is more to life than materialistic items. No amount of Ferraris will ever be a substitute for the happiness of the fisherman in Khao Tao. We are on this planet for a short space of time and when we analyse our lives we do much of it to pass the time. Think of a TV. It doesnt give you happiness but is a tool to waste time before you go to bed. What I learned yesterday is perhaps it is possible to ‘chase the dollar’ for a while for the purpose of achieving what it is in life you REALLY want, rather than existing. To do this takes a change in thinking and NLP, ultimately is a tool to help people change their thinking to get whatever they want in their life. I hope, one day, that you will join us on one of our courses to expand your thinking so that you too, can achieve the life you want.
Posted on: Mon, 04 Nov 2013 21:47:52 +0000
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