Yet for all that, no representative of the Church has ever, to my knowledge, admitted to the patent connection between the character of Jesus and the way he was brought up. Would it not make eminently good sense to encourage believers to follow the example of Mary and Joseph and regard their children as the children of God (which they are) rather than treating them as their own personal property? -Alice Miller I was raised to be obedient. It was a lesson delivered through a few different forms of discipline, including physical discipline. It didnt make me a stronger, or smarter, or more self-controlled person. It made me more fearful and less self-controlled. It made less able to internally regulate my emotions and behaviors. I am still afraid to fully express things like honesty, curiosity, and anger. I resist the temptation to individualize this and heap all blame on my own family; we faced stresses and scarcities that wealthy families dont face. At the same time, I know too many poor and working families parenting in an explicitly non-abusive way to pretend it all comes down to structure. When I see the differences between my approach to the world and that of my partner (who was not disciplined into obedience as a child), its clear to me that obedience is a key stumbling block in my struggle to emulate Christ. This was part of my discernment in quitting the ordination process. I am already too well-trained in following orders, holy or unholy. Im working on cultivating a habit and a discipline of holy disobedience these days: holy resistance, holy crankiness, holy No. Encourage the children in your life to test out these things. They will need them.
Posted on: Sun, 28 Dec 2014 21:29:21 +0000
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