Youre walking in the woods Theres no one around and your phone is dead Out of the corner of your eye you spot him: Shia LaBeouf. Hes following you, about 30 feet back He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint Hes gaining on you Shia LaBeouf Youre looking for you car but youre all turned around Hes almost upon you now and you can see theres blood on his face My God, theres blood everywhere! Running for you life (from Shia LaBeouf) Hes brandishing a knife (Its Shia LaBeouf) Lurking in the shadows Hollywood superstar Shia LaBeouf Living in the woods (Shia LaBeouf) Killing for sport (Shia LaBeouf) Eating all the bodies Actual cannibal Shia LaBeouf Now its dark and you seem to have lost him but youre hopelessly lost yourself Stranded with a murderer you creep silently through the underbrush Aha! In the distance A small cottage with a light on Hope! You move stealthily toward it but your leg! Ah! Its caught in a bear trap! Gnawing off your leg (Quiet, quiet) Limping to the cottage (Quiet, quiet) Now youre on the doorstep Sitting inside: Shia LaBeouf Sharpening an axe (Shia LaBeouf) But he doesnt hear you enter (Shia LaBeouf) Youre sneaking up behind him Strangling superstar Shia LaBeouf Fighting for your life with Shia LaBeouf Wrestling a knife from Shia LaBeouf Stab him in his kidney Safe at last from Shia LaBeouf You limp into the dark woods blood oozing from your stump leg But you have won; you have beaten Shia LaBeouf
Posted on: Sat, 22 Mar 2014 18:36:45 +0000
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