after truly for a short time now, fighting a very hard battle against satan, to embrace The Lord and turn my life around to become a Christian, and fight anything that May Hender me from coming to The Lord, I will not back down, Im not a saint, its a fight, and there is so many things that satan is doing to me that makes me think I can cant do it, but nothing is going to stop me, some of my best friends, that I love, are walking away from me, and it hurts....and there is even things that Im not posting online that is much worse. And its breaking me. And thoughts that....Im not going to say whats going through my head right now. Im not looking for pity or attention. But the emotional pain is so bad. Satan is trying to take me back when I didnt love me, I hated me.....And I think thats enough said to some of you that you know what Im talking about, and what Im capable of doing. And no way am Im not talking about violence. If I was ever violent, it was towards my self. My faith is love, my faith is not hate, now I have some of the most important people walking out of my life, people that I need in my life, that are no longer there. Things went bad last night between me and wife, and then it seemed due to a few people that I know care a lot about me, and prayed. And God stepped in and made things right. And today unaware satan snuck right back in and finished off what I believed had been turned around. But I didnt keep my guard up, and when satan found a weakness he snuck in, and finished his hatefulness and now has broken me to the point now it cant be repaired. Because neither me or my wife want it to get worse, to where we hate each other, that now its not worth for to us to go on, knowing its not going to work, at least this way, we can still be there for each other, and remain friends. Its just better this way. Im not kicking her out, I still love her, just not in love with her. And Ill take the blame, shes a wonderful woman, and a selfless person, she does everything she can to help people as much as she can. I just woke up to late. So if its anyone to blame, its me. And due to both of us on disability. I will give her all the she needs to be able to move out and to not be scared. Im not that kinda person. I would never do that. Its a sad day....But please pray for the both of us.....And please pray for me if you will that I do not reach the point of hurting myself. I dont feel that way at all right now. But if you dont mind, please pray for that. I love all of you, even if you dont care for me. Much love peace. Mike S Parten
Posted on: Fri, 15 Aug 2014 21:48:15 +0000
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