haha saw this again in my baul, cant believe, i can be this serious ====== Dear Anonymous, I won’t bother to know who you are as I feel I’d stir your comfort zone if I take efforts to know who you are. In a nutshell, let me state things and see if I got you right! you said in your email that you came from a broken family and that you see the same pattern happening to the very own family you are trying to build now, that everything is headed for disaster, did I get things right? There are few things playing on my mind after I have read your email and I’ll just say them at random without quoting specific parts of your email least I’d threaten your comfort zone by exposing you to the risk of being identified. 1. Acceptance; There are some realities in life where the best thing we can do about is to stop trying to change them and just accept them as they are. Your father abandoned you when you were kids, that’s done and there is nothing you can do about that…spend all your life, your energies trying to do something about it, you can not undo what was done. yes, you say all you need is to understand why he did what he has done. That’s should be okay if we get the chance to hear people’s side but should it be something we put all our time and efforts on? Sometimes there are things in life where only time will allow us to understand how things are. In worst cases there are times when we are bound never to understand something and we just have to accept that. 2. The cycle; I hope it wont be too late for you to realize that you are allowing yourself to get caught in a vicious cycle of failed relationships and hurts. You came from a broken family and you don’t have to repeat history. Sometimes the problem is, in our attempts not to repeat history, we unknowingly repeat them by the things we do. 3. Generalization: Don’t you think it’s high time you stop comparing your marriage now to the marriage your parents had? your parent’s marriage is a thing of the past, you’re marriage now is the concern of the present, it is something you can do things about. 4. realities of marriage; Don’t you think that’s its high time you re-define your concept of marriage? marriage like any other relationship is not all about love because there are times when love temporarily flies out of the window and you’ll be tempted let those plates in the kitchen fly out as well. There are other things that makes up a relationship, communication and friendship also makes marriage work. 5. forgiveness; I hope your inability to see things past what they manifest is not because you have you have too much hatred and bitterness in your heart towards people who hurt you. While your heart is still full of anger, hatred and bitterness, you’ll find it hard to accept things. Break the cycle and redefine your concept of some things that are important in life and yes, forgiveness might also mean learning to forgive yourself. I can sense that you are angry with yourself for things you thought you are incapable of doing, for mistakes you have done. Remember, we will find it hard to forgive others if we can not forgive ourselves 6. Slow down slow down…….slow down….slow down and take time to listen to life talking to you, slow down and take time to listen to what silence is telling you, slow down and listen to what all these noise is telling you, slow down and listen to what your wife is telling you behind all those yelling, slow down and listen to what the simple cries and laughter of your baby is saying……slow down and listen to GOD’s footsteps if only to know where he is in all of this………….slow down God Bless You ..anonymous
Posted on: Tue, 10 Sep 2013 02:38:14 +0000
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