im home now im where i wanna be. im smelling blankets and pillows just to be close to my big guy if not for a second or two. his bowls are left dirty with food in them. i cant bring myself to clean them yet. today i had to put my best friend to rest. this morning i a woke and he was just still laying at the foot of the bed sleeping. he wouldnt get up. an hr went by. i figured i would give him his meds then get a shower but leave him home today. as i was leaving he came to the door like dont forget me dad. so i took choochie boy with me to the shop. he laid outside in the sun as he would always do. he loved the sun. the warmth on his skin. the lady next door came over and when i was done talking to her i looked back where chooch was and he was gone. after about an hr of looking i finally found him next door laying down in the wet grass unresponsive and his heart beating like crazy. he never goes over there and to be laying down over there?? this was the moment i had been waiting for. he tried to hide and die on his own. he wanted so much to not hurt me that he tried to hide and die all alone. he wouldnt get up then when he finally did he looked like he was gonna fall. he sat right down. i carried him across the field and laid with him in the sun crying til michelle showed up. a piece of my whole being died today on that table at the vet. the absolute hardest thing i have ever had to do. i felt like i was giving up on him somehow. i feel like when i sleep this moment will haunt me. i felt myself getting mad because i thought the dr wasnt compassionate enough. i tell ya i havent cried like this in my whole entire life. he was my co pilot, my best friend. i would give anything to get him back. our time with him was cut so short. he had more love to give, we had more love to give. when i tell u he was the best dog ever im not just saying it to say it. people that knew Choochie-Boy knew what he was, knew he was gr8 in every sense of the word. he loved to give himself to everyone that was good to him. he understood ur words, he could almost bark back something to u to make you understand him. he will be missed by so many. my life will never be the same without him. nothin no one will ever replace my Choochie-Boy My BIG GUY. at night on the couch watching tv will be lonely without u buddy. the 3am walks outside that pissed me off sometimes will be missed. i wanna thank you Choochie-Boy for giving me the best five yrs of my life with you. you have changed me in so many ways. i know some of you probably dont care or think he is just a dog or hey why are they making such a big deal about a dog. why because we love him i love him and he loved us unconditionally. he gave himself to us and we gave ourselves to him. he was my 1st dog that was truely mine. they say u only get one truely gr8 dog in a lifetime well he was mine and now he is gone and nothing can change that. i will forever remember all the gr8 times we have had with u Choochie-Boy. I LOVE YOU BIG GUY, u are my BIG GUY forever & alwayZ watch over us and protect us as u alwayZ have. I miss u already. i am sorry ur time here was so short my love
Posted on: Sat, 27 Dec 2014 02:14:44 +0000
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