30 Funny Facts About Turning 30 1. You leave gigs before the encore to beat the rush 2. You own a lawnmower 3. You stop dreaming of becoming a professional footballer and start dreaming of having a son who might instead 4. Before throwing the local paper away, you look through the property section 5. You prefer later with Jools Holland to Top of the Pops 6. All of a sudden, Tony Blair is not 46, hes only 46 7. Before going out anywhere, you ask what the parking is like 8. Flicking through Heat magazine makes you too tired to go out 9. Rather than throw a knackered pair of trainers out, you keep them because theyll be all right for the garden 10. You buy your first ever T-shirt without anything written on it 11. Instead of laughing at the innovations catalogue that falls out of the newspaper, you suddenly see both the benefit and money saving properties of a plastic winter cover for your garden bench and an electronic mole repellent for the lawn. Not to mention the plastic man for the car to deter would be thieves. 12. You start to worry about your parents health. 14. Sure, you have more disposable income, but everything you want to buy costs between £200 and £500 15. You dont get funny looks when you buy a Disney video or a Wallace and Gromit bubble bath, as the sales assistant assumes they are for your child 16. Pop music all starts to sound a bit crap 17. You opt for Pizza Express over Pizza Hut because they dont have any pictures on the menus and anyway, they do a really nice half-bottle of house white 18. You become powerless to resist the lure of self-assembly furniture 19. You always have enough milk in 20. To compensate for the fact that you have little desire to go clubbing, you instead frequent really loud tapas restaurants and franchise pubs with wacky names in the mistaken belief that you have not turned into your parents 21. While flicking through the TV channels, you happen upon C4s Time team with Tony Robinson. You get drawn in. 22. The benefits of a pension scheme become clear. 23. You go out of your way to pick up a colour chart from B&Q 24. You wish you had a shed 25. You have a shed 26. You actually find yourself saying They dont make em like that anymore and I remember when there were only 3 TV channels and Of course, in my day 27. Radio 2 play more songs you know than Radio 1 - and Jimmy young has some really interesting guests on, you know 28. Instead of tutting at old people who take ages to get off the bus, you tut at school children whose diction is poor 29. When sitting outside a pub you become envious of their hanging baskets 30. You make an effort to be in and out of the curry house by 11
Posted on: Sat, 12 Oct 2013 21:29:36 +0000