Dear Ms. Zane, Im writing you for three reasons. The first is about my father. I emailed you several months ago concerning my fathers wife and how she treats me. You and your fans said that It would be better if I didnt go visit him at home anymore, so I stopped going. Now, he wants nothing to do with me. I cant even get him to answer my phone calls, and when he does answer, he rushes me off the phone. I miss him so much, and it hurts because I never wanted to lose our relationship, but I had to do what was best for my sanity. My father may be going through a lot, but Im tired of making excuses for his shenanigans. Im tired of giving him the benefit of doubt, and Im tired of being the black sheep. I want to be close to my father and younger siblings, and I want my stepmother to except that Im human and that Ill never be perfect. Please tell me, Ms. Zane, am I asking for too much? The second issue is one of self-esteem. I want to love myself, but how do I do that when I cant shake the guilt of my past? I know I said in my last email that Im learning to love myself, but its not that simple. I have to fight myself everyday. I live behind a facade that may, one day, kill me. I smile when I feel like crying because I dont want people asking questions. I know I need to love myself, and I also know that if I could love myself as hard as I love others, Id be an amazing human being, but I cant. The third, and final, reason for this message is my poetry. Some of your fans want to read it, but Im afraid to share because I fear it may be stolen. It has happened to me before. The only way Ill share is if you can ensure my poetry will be secure. I trust you, but I dont know who, or what, may be lurking in your fan base, so Ill withhold until I receive a response. Yours Truly, ~The Step Child MY RESPONSE: I am not going to post your poetry because I certainly cannot guarantee that it will not be used elsewhere. But you should keep cleansing your soul by writing it whenever you are moved to do so. No, you are not asking for too much from your father and I do remember how he allowed his wife to mistreat you. I am sorry that he is acting like that but he is grown and he is making the decisions that are clearly wrong but somehow make sense to him. No parent should ever choose someone else over their children. As for your self-esteem, you have to continue to understand that you are what you believe you are. Self-love is one of the hardest traits to embrace and unless you increase your self-esteem, life will continue to be hard. You are right! If you could love yourself the way you love others, you would never allow anyone else to hurt you. I also suggest you start journaling so you can look back and see how far you have come, or what you still need to overcome. God bless you and I will keep you in my prayers.
Posted on: Sun, 02 Nov 2014 18:57:10 +0000
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