(EDITED) Peanuts, modern-day: Schroeder has been diagnosed as - TopicsExpress

(EDITED) Peanuts, modern-day: Schroeder has been diagnosed as severely autistic, and at the doctors suggestion to be alone in doors at all times playing the piano; Lucy is in a state run reform school, after intentionally breaking Charlie Browns spine, and has been diagnosed as a sociopath; pig pen is in a CPS facility; Linus had regression therapy to discover the source of his oral/blanket fixation (he was abducted by aliens); Charlie Brown is on 5 different antidepressants and is home schooled due to his social anxiety (he has never even seen the Little Redheaded Girl) he weighs 233 lbs at 9 years of age; Sally ran away to be a scientologist and is working 15 hours a day, 7 days a week on Hollywood blvd. as a recruiter; Peppermint Patty is a girl kicker for the school football team; Marcy is an openly gay class president/valedictorian; and Snoopy is on a commercial with Sarah McLaughlin, because everyone is too caught up in their own troubles to feed him.

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