Firstly, I would like to apologize to David Cameron for calling him a “toolbag” earlier today, it was out of character and brazen, I’m sure he had important business to get to oppressing the Scots people or something of the like. Secondly, the story: I’m leaving my office in Scottish Parliament today and I get on the elevator. I’m wearing a pinstriped three piece suit topped off with bright-red Scottish Tartan bowtie. After pushing the ground floor button, I repeatedly press the elevator door-close button as I put in my ipod earbuds to jam to Michael Buble “I’m Feeling Good” as I race walk to campus for class. I was already running late. As the elevator starts to move, the second floor button light comes on and the elevator comes to a stop. I shift impatiently at the delay. As soon as the door opens there is a rather large, imposing man angrily standing there glaring at me, he says something I couldnt’ hear because of the music. Confused, as the normal protocol for using an elevator is stepping onto it, I slowly start to take out my ear buds to see what the commotion is. As I’m taking them out, he rapidly starts motioning at me, waving and yelling to get off the elevator. I recognize security headpiece in his ear and start to panic, “is the elevator about to explode?,” “Is there a security threat?,” “am I in danger?” I quickly start moving from the back of the elevator to step out and turn left, when all of a sudden, he starts yelling “RIGHT! RIGHT!” Unsure as to why I would go right when I know there is a wall on the right, I go left…. I take one step, I look up from finally taking my ear buds out and there is the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom David Cameron with fifteen staffers waiting behind him. The agent pulls me away from the Prime Minister and clears room for them to enter the elevator I was formerly on. One, I don’t take up that much space in the elevator. Two, I’m wearing a bow-tie, I’m definitely not a security threat. Unsure, I look at the security agent and ask, “Was that David Cameron?” He looks proud and responds, “Yes it was.” I look at him in the eye and comment, “Oh, I wouldn’t know… I’m American.” *Walks Away*
Posted on: Thu, 22 Jan 2015 17:23:46 +0000
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