Healing Myth #6 Healing means understanding what went wrong, or who did what to me. To heal, we do not have to understand what went wrong in our life or who did what to us. If a person is recovering from a heart attack, would his recovery be enhanced by trying to figure out what he did wrong, or who did what to him? I think not. Instead, he needs to rest, including his conscious, chattering mind. The fact is, we cannot know what went wrong or how we arrived at our present situation until we experience it with our biology. We cannot see the forest if we are looking at a tree. Likewise, we cannot see the benefit in a hurt or trauma from the place of our suffering. We cannot resolve any problem with the same consciousness that created the problem in the first place. Hate cannot resolve hate, anger cannot resolve anger, and confusion cannot resolve confusion. Resolution can only occur when we move outside the context of the situation that troubles us. As we heal, we can stand back, put distance between ourselves and our situation, and gain a new perspective. Only then can we expand our awareness and see where we have been. This is why, when we are having a fight with our partner, at least one of us needs to take a break, go for a walk, and gently breathe for a few minutes. After we calm down, we can then work to resolve the situation from a perspective other than rage and fury. Studies in meditation and biofeedback show that when the conscious mind becomes relatively silent, our blood pressure drops, immune function improves, healing is enhanced, and love is more available. When relaxed, we tend to feel more compassionate, more creative, and more connected to the primal web of life. The shift in our physiology is what triggers a shift in our awareness. Once our awareness shifts, we are able to discover and implement new ideas, but new ideas do not shift our awareness. Instead, a change in the physiology and integrity of our bodymind shifts our awareness. Only when our bodymind is ready are we able to receive new ideas that assist us in healing. Until then, we resist new ideas or practices that could have much to offer. When our physiology has healed enough, we even find new ideas easy to implement. Something from deep inside tells us, “Now’s the time! I’m ready!” An old adage reminds us: “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.” Have you ever tried to interest your partner in a new way of doing something? It may be an exercise program that obviously works for you, or a diet that he knows is good for him. You think, “Perhaps if I give him one more article on this subject, or a new tape discussing the benefits, he will come around.” Encouraging him to change becomes a source of tension in your relationship. Then one night as you lay in bed talking, he tells you that he ran into an old friend who gave him the very book you have wanted him to read for several years. Your partner is excited about the “new” idea, and suddenly he can’t wait to implement it. Donny Epstein
Posted on: Fri, 25 Oct 2013 10:58:09 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015