I drank myself to the ground because I remembered when I was told that I deserve to suffer. Some of you dont know what feels like to be told this, and I hope no one in your lives ever tells you that. I suppose I am not good enough, and i dont deserve anything. I am not worthy of being given the benefit of the doubt. I dont deserve love, so why go looking for it or even waiting for it to come to me. It is love and a broken heart that drove me to where I am now. Today scared the shit out of me because it was blood that I threw up. It hurt like hell. I dont ever want to feel that again. I will drink socially once I a while with my friends or by myself, but not like last night.. not ever again. I have big plans and drinking like that will push me further from my goals. I wont allow myself to be consumed by this darkness.
Posted on: Thu, 28 Nov 2013 02:08:03 +0000
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