I know this song was written, describing a heroin-addicted couple, and in the context of the heroin addiction epidemic in Dublin at the time. But tonight..how its speaking to me..its making me think of someone in my life whos suffering right now. Hes been suffering for years, actually. Hes a type of artist, by trade. And never finds success. Hes in his late fifties in age now. And his body is beaten. And hes tired. And hes alone. Hes a dreamer, but none of his dreams have come true. He knows hes talented, but he never had the guts to really go for it. He wanted a wife and kids. It never happened. He works from morning til night. And this is not exaggerating. He cant even pay his rent. He goes from place to place. Hes lost money, hes lost his health. And he envisions it will be this way the rest of his life. Hes funny, though. And a charmer. And he writes about his days here on Facebook. A lot of it is good stuff. But, in between the lines, hes..bleeding. And no one seems to notice. They just laugh and tell him what a great writer he is. And they keep encouraging him. Complimenting him on his talent and spirit and heart. But no ones saying You shouldnt have to live like this! They just dont see it, I guess. Me? I want to say to him that I see his pain. And I want to tell him..I wanna tell him Jesus loves him. Its so weird, because I never really saw myself as being someone to say something like that to someone. I always felt like it was..too trite. Or..just a saying or something. But..lately..its like. Well, from my own experience, of late..this is the honest truth. Theres no other way I could say it to him. And I know. Because I was there. These last three years..have been devastating to me. I was in a downward spiral. After my car accident, I lost everything. And things just kept getting worse and worse. But you know, my Christian friends, Eva mostly, would remind me that Jesus loves me, and wants so badly to help me. But I didnt believe her. I was a Christian, but I didnt believe that God was greater than my problems. So this went on for a loooongggg time. And I was living in desperation. Crying (a lot). Isolating myself because I was getting sick and tired of calling people and crying. Pretty bad, huh? Recently, though, I ended up talking with this new friend at church. Telling her my story. Telling her about all my hopelessness. She asked if I was praying for myself. If I was asking God for help. I confessed (yet again) that I hadnt been. I could never really explain why. Its like..part of me felt too unworthy, cos I had screwed up so much. And then also..its like, I think I felt like I had to save myself, you know? Like, thats so much of the attitude in this world. Like, youre a loser if you dont pull yourself up by your own bootstraps and all that. Maybe. But anyway..for some reason I decided to follow her advice. To just simply ask God for help. The Bible says that our faith should be like that of a child. That we should go to our Father as we did our earthly parents, and He will provide. So yeah, I did that. And believe it or not, things immediately started changing. Like, the next day. And not even two weeks later, I got a job. After struggling and getting nowhere for three years. And some other things. Like, hes helping me with my panic problems. He goes with me when I ask. And then Im not afraid. (Like the Footprints poem--the one set of footprints in the sand..thats when He carried me)..yup, its the truth. Make no mistake--this is MAJOR to me. Because..its so debilitating. And limiting. And scary. Yeah, so anyway, the jobs going really good. I mean, REALLY. I went from having no job and crying and sad and unsure and hopeless..and useless-feeling, to having a really good-paying job, that I really should not be able to do. Its in an accounting department of a construction services management company. Based on my resume, theyre constantly amazed by what Im picking up on and learning and retaining and stuff. I was just supposed to be doing general clerical stuff. But now theyve got me doing some more advanced things. A man came up to me the other day, to my cubicle, to introduce himself. He said his name was John, and hed wanted to come to meet me cos hed been hearing so many good things about me/my work. When I told my supervisor about it, he explained that this John who came to see me..hes the CFO of the company. I really didnt know what that meant (Im not really a business-type, though..Im more creatively concentrated..) But yeah, the Chief Financial Officer of the company. Just a step below the CEO. Right? And he wanted to meet ME. Three weeks ago I had no job, no prospects. Just fear. The reason for all this? I pray every morning now. I ask God to help me do a good job. Help me understand the things I may not understand, so I can be of service to them. The Bible says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I never really believed that, you know? Another one of those trite expression things. Well, Hes demonstrating to me that its true. The empirical evidence is right there. Because I really would never understand any of this stuff without Gods help. Let alone be GOOD at it! So yeah..now Im finding out about this person and his struggles. And I really cant do anything about it. Well, I can pray..yup! But I cant talk to him. Because Im not his friend and he has no interest in changing that. Hes hanging onto some kind of hurt from the past is the best I can understand. He doesnt like or trust me. Which..well, it would make sense, right, that I would then turn my back to him. I mean, why would a person waste their time on someone who believes the worst about them? But..all I can feel is sorry for him. I mean, I really do. I feel bad there arent Christians in his life to encourage and pray for him. (Not that I know of, at least.) I just see him, like this song. Like I was. Running to stand still. Working his fingers to the bone, dropping into bed each night, from exhaustion. And with all this work, all this time and blood and sweat and tears..nothing to show for it all. Just pain, frustration, exhaustion. Never getting ahead. Hes a slave. And with, as far as he can see, no hope of reprieve. My prayer is that somehow, Jesus will get through. And trade burdens with him. Come to me all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30 It really is true. So if any of you are praying types..can you please lift this man up in prayer? Hes been a punching bag for the enemy for way too long. Thanks! youtu.be/FvUI-s4Azw4
Posted on: Mon, 20 Oct 2014 04:08:10 +0000
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