I wont have pictures of me until later of the ceremony... the following was my concluding words... Cmdr. Jack Dies, W.H. Griffin Camp, gentlemen of the SCV, Ladies of UDC, family, special guests, thank you for giving this California girl an opportunity to say a few words. Today you doing more than just placing a marker on a compatriot’s grave. Today you’re completing a dream. You are, indeed, completing a man. My husband, Charles Eugene Petty, was given up for adoption by his birth mother Virginia Petty. Virginia’s eldest brother Gene adopted Charlie when he was 2 years old. So you see Charlie’s Uncle became his Father, his Mother became his Aunt. Therefore, Charlie is his own cousin, making Charlie a true Southerner. In July 1947 Charlie went into a house that his dad and Charlie’s Uncle Jack had been building. It was the last of home of their building contract for a subdivision in Moses Lake Washington. Gene was sanding the floor. The last bit of work to be done. He promised his 6 year old son that when he finished with the floor, they would go fishing. Little Charlie left the house to play in the vacant lot across the street. The next thing Charlie knew was a force knocked him flat to the ground. The house blew up with his father inside. Charlie’s “stepmother” (as Charlie called his adopted mother) took Charlie away from Washington State and most importantly away from his aunts, uncles, his cousin’s, and – most importantly, the Petty history. My story however, picks up 50 years later. Charlie was a man with a history of broken marriages. He was angry, hurt, wandering, working 70 hour weeks attempting to diminish the hole in his heart. If he wanted something- he depended on no one. He would just get it for himself. On 0ur 2nd Christmas together, Charlie indicated to me that he wished to have a new VCR. I called my daughter Melodie asking her to put a VCR and layaway for me at Kmart. A few days later I came home to discover I was now half owner of a brand-new VCR. I called Melodie to go to Kmart to take the VCR off layaway. A few nights later Charlie lamented to me, “You know I should have gotten a DVD player.” I called Melodie. Put a DVD player on layaway I told her. She went to Kmart and placed the player on layaway. A few days later Charlie bought a DVD player hooking it to our television. Melodie went back to Kmart to remove the DVD player out of layaway. A few days later Charlie and I were working in the garden and he said he wished he had this particular tool. I called Melodie to put the tool on layaway. And you guessed it, a few days later he got the tool. I called Melody to take the tool out of layaway. Needless to say Melody didn’t do any more layaways at Kmart. If Charlie wanted something he would provide for himself. Charlie just couldn’t conceive the idea that someone actually would listen to his dreams, his heart, and his wishes and would try to make his desires come true. On our honeymoon in Charleston South Carolina, Charlie reveled in the history of Revolutionary War, the War of 1812, War of Northern Aggression, World War I, World War II, Korea and Vietnam War. All that history was represented in Charleston in the area around it. Charlie somehow kept every date, each general, each history, and each story straight. He could at the end of the day- and even today- can relate all that information back to you. On one of the last days of our honeymoon we stopped at Sheldon’s Churchyard. Built before the Revolutionary War it was burned down by the British. Rebuilt and burned down by Sherman’s troops, it’s now just 4 brick walls and a pulpit. We visited it on a gray and drizzly day and my groom had climbed up on the above ground graves wiping the rain off of the faded engravings- reading the history of those buried there. I prayed at that moment that God would show Charlie his own history his own family. That he wouldn’t have to strive to learn someone else’s history- that he would have one of his own. July August and September were always hard for Charlie, His children- who he hadn’t seen since they were 5 and 3 years old- were born in August and September and of course his dad had died in July. Charlie would drink - trying in vain- to relieve the pain. Once again, he bemoaned that he had no family, no one loved him and no one cared. After three years of marriage Charlie finally got to see why my co-workers call me Dr. Sparky. Why couldn’t he see that I loved him, my daughter, her husband and their children adored him? Why couldn’t our love be enough? I slammed the hot on the counter and yelled, “Do you really think that your daddy got up that morning and said to himself, I am going to promise my boy to take him fishing- but instead I think I will blow myself up in house?” I asked if he thought that the fact that a man blowing himself in a house up with his six-year-old boy playing across the street was would be big news in 1947 Moses Lake, Washington state. He said yes. I sent him to the Internet and on quest that is yet to end. About four weeks later he found his cousins with whom he used to play with in Moses Lake. By the end of the year there was a family reunion. 25 Petty’s, Cousins, children, grandchildren who set around a table and relived memories. There where children, even cousins, who never knew that Charlie existed as they all thought Charlie had died years before. On our way home we went back to Sheldon Church. This time the sun was shining, people milled around the hollowed grounds. Charlie, who had never met a stranger- began telling people of the story of Sheldon’s Church yard. But there was a difference, because this time he also shared his family history. A few years later he discovered his great grandpa who we honor today. FM Petty was the fountainhead for Charlie for through FM he found his history, his pride, in fact, his connection to this world. Charlie also found the Sons of the Confederate Veterans, he found Kinsman and a cause to fight for. Charlie found -well Charlie found himself. Today, as we mark compatriot FM Petty’s grave you may have completed FM’s journey by this honorable assembly, but you also completed my husband’s. When we were told that my Charlie had 6 to 18 months live, a friend asked, “So, buddy, what’s on your bucket list?” Charles Petty, The man who was self-contained, self-indulgent, who needed no one, and thought no one loved him - didn’t ask for his pickup truck or his big-screen TV or even the redhead with 30,000 acres who lived in Texas. He said “I want to put a grave marker on make great granddaddy’s grave.” And with that one statement there was not one dry eye in the room- for Charlie finally understood, ‘family’. He finally understood history on a personal level. So today we just don’t honor FM Petty we honor family, we honor those who’ve come before us and those who march ahead. We honor the brotherhood of the SCV, of the UDC, who made this day possible for one man- this Charles Eugene Petty- to use the end of his life to gather his family. Hubert Petty, Thomas Petty, James Darwin Petty, Thomas Petty, John Marion Petty, Francis Marion Petty, John Henry Petty, Virginia Petty ,Marion Eugene Petty, Charles Petty. From a six-year-old boy who lost everything to a 73-year-old man who found everything. Who appreciates it more than most of us- as he had lost his story- but now has found it- Family. Again we thank you. We thank the SCV camps in the UDC ladies who made this ceremony possible we thank the glorious state of Texas who – long ago- accepted our family from Tennessee. Texas who cradle their bones in her precious earth. Thank you for your traditions, for your honor and most of all – thank you- for family. Thank you for this glorious day.
Posted on: Sat, 13 Sep 2014 22:09:24 +0000
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