Its been almost a wk since I have updated this page. This last wk has been extremely busy! I havnt had time to even sleep, never mind the energy to post anything. But heres a quick recap (if thats possible). We started the wk off w repositioning Zacharys feeding tube from his intestines to his stomach. It was by passing his stomach to put less stress on his heart, while he was in intensive care. This change, while small, caused him some discomfort. His stomach had not seen any food for 3 wks. His stomach muscles shrank and had to get used to having food in it. It caused him to vomit a lot. They also began weaning him off one of the sedation meds and my poor baby was having withdrawal symptoms which were severe fussiness, crying, restlessness, sweating and vomiting! I left this hospital 1 time all wk because obviously Zachary needed his mommy! I needed to be here to comfort him as best I could. I did a lot of bouncing around w him between changing sweaty clothes and linens and cleaning up throw up....all day for the past few days!!! Its been exhausting but the worse part is seeing my baby suffer and feeling helpless for him. Today has been a better day. I think hes over the worst of the withdrawals. Hes been really sleepy all day but I think he may be making up for not sleeping at all these past few days. He has, at least, been somewhat comfortable and happy during his short wake times. The downside to those wake times today was that they needed labs drawn on him and it took them 4 different times to finally get it. They tried both of arms and then later had to resort to drawing it from his head. Its excruciating to watch! They put an elastic band around his head and one nurse held him down and the other one sticks the needle in. He was screaming at the top of his lungs and was sweating like crazy! He even managed to get his little legs out of his swaddle and start kicking the nurse (She admitted she deserved it)! My stomach was in knots, I was sweating too, and holding back my tears. I have had a traumatic past w needles myself, so this makes it even more difficult to watch because I can definitely empathize! The nurse told me I could go back to my room until they were done. She could see it was difficult for me. But this wasnt about me and couldnt and wouldnt leave him because it was hard on me! No matter what your mommys presence makes things a little better. Besides I got to pick him up right away and he immediately settled down, nestling his head on me. The nurses even commented on how quickly he settled. Hopefully those lab results show good results so hopefully he can get off some meds before we go home. He is on 9 medications, 3x a day. Before this happened he was only on 2, 2x a day! Other than that we are continuing to try to feed him by mouth (in hopes he doesnt have to come home on this feeding tube) but considering all hes gone through this wk, he hasnt been putting in any effort into eating, so majority of feeds have been through the tube. Hoping he does a turn around and starts to eat on his own in the next couple of days! I dont want to go home w that tube!!! Makes this so much harder to accept since he was such a great eater at home before this. Im praying we get back there very soon! On top of that right now I am very sad! I didnt get to see my daughter all day and I have had very little to no time for her. Its been a challenging balancing act. Its heartbreaking to be away from her! Shes my baby too and I cant be at two places at once! I miss her so much my heart physically aches. I hope she understands one day!!! This is the shortest recap lol! And I left a lot out! Well heres to better week!
Posted on: Mon, 17 Nov 2014 04:16:32 +0000
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