Just as a car with a student driver has a warning on it, big bold letters stating “Student Driver”, I want to warn you that I too am a student driver. I am not an ordained chaplain; instead, I am an Army major. Additionally, in my spare time, I am a seminary student. I am committed to one day being a hospice chaplain. And I have shared my journey with Fern from the time I felt my calling until now when she has been called to her life in eternity. Fern was my biggest fan and she encouraged me often by asking about my classes, telling me to do my homework, and listening to my stories about volunteer work at the hospice. It is my honor to serve her today by speaking at her memorial service. Fern Andrews was 94 years young. She passed away into eternity on July 22, 2013 in her home in Colorado. Fern was born inNebraska on December 26th She married Charles on May 19th. He was the love of her life. She graduated from Creighton College, receiving a degree in Nursing. Anyone who ever spent time with Fern either got medical advise from her or heard her stories about being a nurse in Children’s Hospital and Fitzsimmons Medical Center. Fern had a passion for violets and quilting. Her sewing room was full of pots of African violets and mounds of quilting materials. A typical day for Fern was get up, make breakfast, take breakfast back to bed, eat breakfast in bed while reading a book, spend the rest of the morning quilting, move to the family room in the afternoon to watch CSI re-runs and crochet. In is a safe bet that everyone in this room has something made by Fern. I know that I have cherished and will continue to cherish for years to come, the quilt on my bed that Fern gifted to me when I graduated the Command and General Staff College. Fern was followed in death by her husband and her daughter. She is survived by two daughters and her son-in-law. Four grandchildren, thirteen great grandchildren, and one great great grandchild. Fern loved to read. As mentioned earlier, she would get up in the morning and make breakfast and take it back to bed so that she could both eat breakfast in bed and spend that time enjoying a good book. I have no clue how many books she read or even what titles she read. So, I don’t know if she ever read any of the Mitford series. But, I am reminded of a paragraph in the third book of the series. Father Tim, an Episcopalian priest, is contemplating the loss of Miss Sadie Baxter. Miss Sadie was a member of Lord’s Chapel for more than 80 years. Father Tim had provided her spiritual guidance for more than seventeen years. After her passing, Jan Karon writes this: “He had done this for thirty-eight years – arranging the funeral, delivering the service, consoling the family. But, now he was the family and there was no consolation anywhere. It was as if a part of his own life had been suddenly lost, and there was no getting it back again.” Many of us here today probably feel that very same way. The loss of Fern makes it seem as life will never be the same. And, the truth is that it won’t. How could it be? But, death is as much a part of life as life itself is. The best that any of us can do in a time such as this is celebrate the life that was. So, today, we are here to celebrate Fern. Aunt Mary said that Fern would have wanted us to put her in the ground and then go have a party. Well, we all saw the party hat in the photo collage on the screen above. Obviously she was a party girl. But, we are not going to put her in the ground without the celebration that her life definitely deserved. When I prayed about what message to bring today, over and over I returned to the virtuous woman. Proverbs 31, verses 10 through 31 tell of the virtuous woman. The Message translation of the Bible reads as follows: A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it. Never spiteful, she treats him generously, all her life long. She shops around for the best yarns and cottons, and enjoys knitting and sewing. She’s like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back exotic surprises. She’s up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day. She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden. First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day. She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking. She’s quick to assist anyone in need, reaches out to help the poor. She doesn’t worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks. Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers. She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops. Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile. When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly. She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise: “Many women have done wonderful things, but you’ve outclassed them all!” Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises! As I read those verses, did you see Fern in your mind’s eye? I did. Matthew Henry’s Commentary says that a virtuous woman is a woman of spirit who has command of her own spirit and knows how to manage the spirit of others. Did you ever know a woman with more spirit than Fern? She was a woman who could carry her own in any conversation. Pick a topic, it didn’t matter. She was able to speak her thoughts on that topic. A friend of mine described her as a “feisty old bird” which I thought was quite a compliment. I think she would have thought of it that way also. She was spirited in a good way – a way that challenged others to consider their opinions on topics as well. She was frugal. Not frugal in Scrooge kind of way, but frugal in a way that allowed her to be a financial blessing to her family, and as we noted in the brief notes of her life, she had many grandchildren and great grandchildren and even one great great grandchild. Fern was the kind of woman you could spend an evening with, not saying a word to each other, just enjoying being in each others’ company. You would walk away from such an evening feeling that you had somehow been restored in your own spirit. She sought wool and flax – only today we call them yarn and crochet thread. Armed with knitting needles and a crochet hook, Fern was not an idle woman. She blessed others with the fruits of her works. I cannot even begin to tell you how many baby items Fern created and then had me donate them to the pregnancy center at my church. Fern did not say to anyone – and I would guess that she did not say it to herself either – that she had a nursing degree and had had a wonderful career so she was too good to do anything else. She instead insisted that her days be filled and her mind challenged. My challenge to you today is to seek Proverbs 31 when you find yourself remember Fern and see for yourself how virtuous she was. Remember Fern in that manner. Strive to be either the virtuous woman or like the man who was her husband and was able to trust her and show his pride in her. At the graveside committal service: Committal Service is the proper term for the graveside service held just before the remains are interned. It is a special service in that it truly is the final respects given to the deceased. To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, And a time to die; A time to plant, And a time to pluck what is planted; A time to kill, And a time to heal;A time to break down, And a time to build up; A time to weep, And a time to laugh; A time to mourn, And a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, And a time to gather stones; A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing; A time to gain, And a time to lose;A time to keep, And a time to throw away; A time to tear, And a time to sew; A time to keep silence, And a time to speak; A time to love, And a time to hate;A time of war, And a time of peace. Father God, into Your hands at this time, in this season, we offer Fern up to You. May you provide her with peaceful rest and a joyful reunion with loved ones who have preceded her. Lord, as we leave here today, allow Your healing to provide peace and comfort to those who love Fern and will mourn her loss. Let us continue to celebrate the blessing that she was and to honor You as the one true God. We ask this in Your Son Jesus’ name. Jesus who both entirely man and entirely God. Amen. Ladies and Gentlemen, this concludes the committal service. All of you are invited now to continue the celebration of Fern’s life with her family at the home. Thank you all for sharing this time of remembrance with the family.
Posted on: Thu, 08 Aug 2013 01:25:12 +0000
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