Just want to finally get something right. Tired of trying to be everyone elses normal. I am still trying to live up to being the person I have become without people telling me they dont understand or they dont want to understand. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired and people just do not understand. I can only be me. I worked really hard to be the person I am. I cant be your ideal image you have in your mind. I have my quirks and no you will not be able to help me figure them out. I picked my path a long time ago and this is the path I am on. Its filled with pot holes, rocks, detours, and contruction, but I made it this far. It took this long to love myself. It took this long to know who i am yet because you dont understand its not the right one. Look behind me. Do you see that river? That river was made with my tears. The ones i shed through pain and heartache. The tears i shead everytime someone beat me down and it hurt so bad to just get back up. You see that bridge? It was built for me to get over all of that. You see the scars on my body? They are from every sharp tounge, every knife, and every word that someone has used against me. They are not attractive or the hottest new fad but I carry them to remind me of all those I had to forgive so that the baggage you see over there wouldnt stop me from my path. My pains mixed with my happyness and grew into knowledge so that I could find who I am and love that person so much so that I could love others. If this isnt good enough I am sorry. Maybe this isnt your path. Maybe this is just an intersection for us both. I said it years ago and still preach it. There is one thing i am really good at and its being me. Wheither its Nathan you know, or Ryan. Its still me and thats really all i can ever be. If you want to walk with me lets walk in peace and love. If we cant do that then we can only hope there is another intersection in life where we have learned enough where we can. I am all fought out, i cant cry anymore, i dont care who is right i dont care if Im wrong. I never hired a score keeper for that kind of stuff. I just want to be happy and those in my life to be too and yes no matter what that includes you. -Nathan Brooks
Posted on: Sun, 19 Oct 2014 02:10:57 +0000