Machchardaani - My Spoofy Review At the very outset let me say that the movie wasn’t too bad, Purani Mukherjee looked lovely without make-up, totally underplayed, except the times when she gives bhaashans, or when she’s spewing Hindi cuss words, and there’re plenty of THOSE in the movie. So here we have a Lady Singhdumb, very righteous, very tough, rolling up her sleeves and dealing with hoodlums in a very slap-happy way, mainly she gets very happy when she slaps the shit out of those hoodlums (lums with hoods, remember? Hmm? Hmm?), and with each slap the poor, concussed hoodlum is informed the section number of the Penal Code that’s being slapped on him. Ok, now for the story line... Imagine my surprise when the movie credits informed us that the story was actually WRITTEN by someone! Kya baat! I always thought that Bollywood stories were made up along the way by cameramen and clapper boys with the local chaiwallah throwing in his two bits! Actually! Where was I... hahn... story... Purani Mukherjee is a cop named Shiverani, with a sidey husband, like in most normal marriages, some irritating kid who stays with her and in between doing a couple of push-ups, lifting 2-pound weights with one rep of five, three pull-ups, toe touching twice, she is a home-maker and a jaw breaker (remember those hoodlums? Hmm? Hmm?). There’s also another irritating kid called Pyaawhee (name changed to hide her irritating identity) who is kidnapped by a gang of child traffickers and that’s when Shiverani, the tough Lady Singhdumb, the jaw breaker (remember? Hmm? Hmm?) goes berserk (in fact I very nearly expected her to scream “Aata majhi satakli!”) but she NEVER overacts! Wah! Imagine Bollywood without “actors” OVERACTING!! Kya baat! And of course, you realise that the theme of this movie has been TAKEN from a Hollywood movie, and if you can’t guess which movie I’m talking about, you have a great chance of being TAKEN by a Bollywood producer to write stories for future productions, and if you still can’t guess, you will be TAKEN 2 task! Man, this review is still going nowhere with the STORY! Ok, let’s not digress... suffice it to say that Shiverani, the slap-happy jaw breaker and home-maker, cracks the case (haha sorry to reveal the ending, as if you would have guessed, haha), besides cracking the villain’s skull and other assorted bones, (haha, sorry I revealed THAT too), breaking up the child trafficking gang and setting the young kidnapped girls free. Whee! So, how many stars does this movie deserve? And, should YOU watch the movie? Well, those certainly are deep and imponderable philosophical questions.
Posted on: Sun, 24 Aug 2014 13:18:34 +0000
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